Fostering kids?

Question

My family is thinking about fostering kids. I just wanted to know what it would be like and some advise? Heres some stuff about my family: We arent that close, im 16, my brother is 20, we have 2 big dogs and 2 cats... I think if we decided to foster we'd be really welcoming and warm. So what are some detailes about how they usually act. Ive always wanted a little sister thats just a little bit younger than me, like about 13. Would that just be more trouble sense their a teen. hah.

Thanks in advance.

Answer 1

I was a foster kid from 7 until I aged out at 18.  

I am a little nervous.  You wrote "We arent that close" ~ but then you wrote "we'd be really welcoming and warm."

If you are not that close and do not have a good relationship, adding foster kids to your family will make it worse.  Foster kids generally come from abusive and neglectful backgrounds and they have ENORMOUS needs.  They need ALOT of love and patience.  Some of them (most) have behavioral issues, anything from stealing to hoarding and hiding food.  These are things they had to do to survive growing up.

If you are not a close family, having a foster kid will make it worse.  Trust me, I have been there. Foster kids do not need to be in families where there are problems...they already were removed because of problems in their birth parents.

If you are a close family and just made a typing mistake, it would be wonderful if your family was that giving.  But, it will still be hard.  If you are 16, you might need to recognize that the foster child might take some of your parents time and energy.  

Also, if you do decide to foster, treat them like parent of the family.  Don't treat them "like a foster kid."  I barely had birthday parties or presents.  Sometimes at the holidays, the families would get rid of me for a couple of weeks, so they could have holidays with just their family.  DON'T DO THAT.  It hurts SO MUCH....

Remember that the kids have probably been through h**l and need alot of love and patience and caring and understanding.  But they are generally great kids with alot of resilience!

Answer 2

When you say "we aren't that close", do you mean close in age or that there isn't an emotional closeness in your family?

To be blunt - The last thing a child in the foster care system needs is to be taken into a home that isn't emotionally ready for him or her.  

If you meant age, well I don't think that's an issue.

All humans are different.  Just as you can't predict what a child born into a family will be like, you can't predict what a fostered child wild be like.  

If you have doubts, talk to your parents about it.  Everyone in the family needs to ready for this.

Answer 3

Details of how they usually act.  OK. You're in High School.  Randomly imagine about 12 of your classmates.  Do they all act the same? Neither will foster kids. Some will be loud, some will be quiet.  Most, if not all, will miss their birth families and some will act out (in different ways) more about it. There is no one way foster kids are going to act. sorry.

Answer 4

I would call social services & see if you can make an appointment with them.  Just to talk about what's its like to have a foster child in a home.

Its always best to be educated on these type of things.