Found out my dad isn't my biological dad

Question

I got into a fight with my dad about a year ago and it escalated real quickly. I was about to go on a camping trip and it was late in the evening. He didn't want me to go and we started to argue... The argument got worse and worse and he started to bring in other things from the past... He's always put me down and criticized me for pretty much everything I have done... and he wasn't really there when I was a child to teach or show me exactly what to do... just expected me to do it all without his input, just his put downs... So out of the blue he says something like "call your mom and ask her to tell you the truth" and I said no, because this is our fight and she has nothing to do with it.. (my mom and dad are split) and so he just yells out that he isn't my real dad.... So really I was in a position where I couldn't say anything, because what would you say to something like that? I round up all the clothes on the ground (my dad had thrown all of my clothes out of my closet and threw it on the ground telling me to leave) and just left and went on the camping trip.. at the time I didn't really care, I was with a few friends and I just pushed it out of my mind and tried to have a good time.. I ended up staying out a week and when it came time for me to go back home, he pretended like it never happened... It's been about a year but when I left home for college it started to really hit me... I started to drink a lot and I ended up failing out of a really prestigious school because I had no more motivation, everything I lived for up to about 19 years was a lie.. I know he raised me up, but it wasn't until after he told me that I started to realize that that is exactly why he treated me the way he did... Pretty much treated me like a dog who had no feelings.. I just need some feedback and if this has happened to others, I would like to hear other stories too.. He treats my sister like everything in the world, which is understandable, she is his little girl, but it gives me a feeling of worthlessness... I have been acting very differently this past year and can't seem to snap myself out of it..

Answer 1

They should've told you the truth at the start it wouldn't hurt you as bad sense you lived 19 years with a man that was supposedly your real father...

Answer 2

OK...you're 19 and you're allowing yourself to fail.

Get back into school and focus on you...and building a good foundation for your life.

So many kids are the products of crappy parents )I have nmy own story) - but you've got to succeed to prove them wrong.  If you don't you'll  just continue the cycle and end up with lots of regrets and be a crappy parent yourself.

So...sorry about your stupid father and mother - but f*** them - you need to rise above them and the bad start on life they have given you.  

There are plenty of fathers who treat their daughters better than their biological sons - who knows, maybe he would have been a crappy father anyways.

The best thing you could do is be successful and at graduation say "Bye! See you! Wouldn't want to be you".

Answer 3

I'm not surprised this has come as a shock to you. You need time to get used to this. Is there someone you can talk to about this?

Answer 4

Wow thattttttt sucks!!!!!!!!!  Im sorire

Well why dont you go back to him?