Four-wheel drive for the school run?

Question

I have noticed that some commoners drive their progeniture to school in large four-wheel drives. I have a large estate and need such a vehicle for traversing my acreage. Fortunately my heirs are at boarding school, so we contribute to the planet by avoiding carbon emissions since they only travel back and forward to school twice termly. What are these commoners thinking of? They are unlikely to cross a swamp or meet a buffalo en route to the local comprehensive, and a brisk walk would do the kiddies good. Should we force them to downgrade to a Ford Ka or something?

Answer 1

Damned if I know old girl, don't know where they get their money from to buy those sort of things, I have to make do with last years Bentley, still the nouveau riche seem to be rolling in it even if they are coarse when it comes to spending it. I say, old girl, you aren't thinking of inviting any of them to your house are you? damned irregular if you do, I suspect Beauville is going to, getting a bit Bolshie if you ask me, As for Rotter, well he just invites the village girls, can rely on Chalfont and Charles of course Boombastic is holding steady as is Daveshire and Rabbit.

Answer 2

So vulgar and common those four-wheel drive boxes are!  I once saw a dolt riding in a Humvee stretch limousine.  Now really...is that an absolute contradiction in itself or what?  How silly.  Just as a rose is a rose is a rose,  so it goes with a Humvee.  No matter how you stretch it, one would have to wear combat fatigues just to step up into it.  Yuck.

I've thought the very same thing about the need for these swamp jumpers.  They are just out of place in even common society, much less on your estate.

Keep your livery of limos.  

Now here's an idea for you.  Keep the limos as they are, but for traversing your acreage, why not import a fancy little rickshaw ...WITH a nice little well muscled puller, of course.  How quiet and peaceful it would be, happily riding around your domicile grounds in one of these perky little Asian contraptions!  It would be wonderful, especially in the summertime with your laciest parasol.  You could watch your little trotter work up a lovely sweat while checking on the grounds-keepers progress.

Most of those fellows are small and would probably be very efficient.  They don't eat much and you could keep the uniform very skimpy saving money there too.  You'd be the envy of all your friends, not that you aren't already, of course!

Answer 3

Don't fret so. In the next round of tax increases the Chelsea tractors will find that they are going to pay far more road tax than the sensible commoners.They may have to walk to school in their green wellies.

Answer 4

I agree, they should make them all walk to school and the school hours should be made longer, 6am to at least 8pm in the evening. One cannot get ones Jaguar through all these large vehicles when one needs to venture out from the village estate.

Answer 5

Upstart nouveau riche in vulgar vehicles - they should be taxed out of existence!  To my mind, the commoners are obsessed with safety - as if their offspring were not, in just a few years, going to grow up and become, as pedestrians, the very people most in danger from such juggernauts!  Two games of lacrosse before breakfast in a V necked Chilprufe and short shorts is the kind of training in fortitude in the face of danger that the newly created  Department of Mummies, Daddies and (playground/playing field-free) Academies is sadly bound to prove incapable of delivering.  The planet is doomed.

Answer 6

One does come out with uttter bolxxcks doesn`t one

Answer 7

Lol - i bet you don't even know what most of those words you've used actually mean.

Answer 8

Put them down the mines, the smaller ones could be used to sweep chimneys....

Answer 9

Commoners?, what makes you so good?

Answer 10

Quite why they do this awfully vulgar thing is beyond me.  

I can only assume they are making up for deficiencies in the trouser department.  

We can't force them to downgrade, but we can coerce them by, perhaps, making these monstrosities outrageously expensive to run.  

I always choose my own personal transport by using the adage that a car should be my servant, and not that I should be my car's serf.

Answer 11

No, SUVs are safer and more comfortable than estate cars.

Answer 12

Yes, they would save money with a smaller car which they could spend on their child`s education. They could all afford a copy of the Highway Code - if they can read , that is.

Answer 13

yes whatever one says

Answer 14

Why on earth do commoners need school at all ?...it only fills their heads with absurd ideas and causes unrest in society as they struggle to reach beyond the natural boundaries of class and breeding. By closing down the state school system we can reduce our tax burden, restore order to society and save the planet at the same time. Who on earth could disagree with that?

By the way, the thought of you and jinglebells clad in just your V necked Chilprufe and pants is quite stirring the blood! I'm definitely up for two games of lacrosse before breakfast.