Friend's child says "I'm gonna just kill myself..."?

Question

He's only 4, and he says this quite frequently when he gets angry or upset. It disturbs me because it seems unusual that a child that age would even have the concept of such a thing, and I've never heard it from any other kids I've been around. He is also a very moody, serious kid sometimes...have you seen this in any kids that you know? I'm feeling like I should really encourage his parents to consider therapy or something...am I overly concerned? Over-reacting? (Very close friends - more like family.)

Answer 1

He must have heard it from somewhere. Maybe even commercial on TV. I don't think him saying it means that he really have a concept of it. Kids that age say a lot of things like they mean it, but they don't really truly understand what it means. I have a 3 and 5 yr old so I understand your concern. I would talk to the parents about your concern nd have them explain to that boy what it means.  

Answer 2

Yeah . . . he just picked that up somewhere . . . In fact he probably took it out of context when he heard someone say this because they weren't getting their way, or were upset (most likely a movie).  His parents SHOULD be discouraging him to say this and talking with him about how serious that statement is.  They probably are.  I wouldn't be too concerned.

One time my 4 yr old watched a barbie movie where barbie said, "you're ruining my life!!"  . . . Of course *everything* I did from then on out was "ruining her life".  Yep, no cookies for breakfast . . . "ruining her life"

EDIT:

Also, if you want to bring it up with the parents, try to do so in a non chalant way, not accusingly.  For instance, "I heard __ say __ the other day! That's so crazy, where did he pick that up?"

They'll probably give you an earful.

Answer 3

He has definitely heard that from someone else.  I think the first step would be to find out who.

Answer 4

what do they do when he says that? my son is a little over 3 and just like others said, kids at this age SOAK UP EVERYTHING, they say and do the way they see other people do, or from games or tv.  I have seen a few kids like that and there was always some kind of emotional problem, family problems really, what are his parents like? take a look at his lifestyle and the way his parents parent him, and that should give you some answers.

Answer 5

I would defiantly suggest therapy.

It isn't normal for a four year old to say that (even if someone around him is)

Answer 6

Children at that age are major sponges. He had to have gotten it from somewhere. My 4 year old says that on occasion, and I found out she got it from her half sister at her dad's house. I have spoken to a child psychiatrist and she says to let my daughter know it us unacceptable to talk of such things. We've also got strategies for punishing her now that really work. My daughter has no intentions of suicide, but she hears her 11 year old half sister saying it and she repeats it when she's upset or angry. Just let his parents know and reinforce that it isn't a good sign, and letting him get away with it isn't going to help. He needs someone other than his parents to talk to about being angry and to learn how to control his emotions. It's not a bad thing to talk to a therapist, and it usually gives you insights about your kids that you never knew. Our therapist helps us very well. Good luck with the child's parents, and hopefully everything will be okay with the boy.