Friend Passed Away Yesterday?

Question

Our friend passed away yesterday. He was not a very close friend but more than an acquaintance. We are in the same neighborhood.

We live 4 blocks away, so I thought we should visit in person. Is it too soon to visit his wife and children? I know that their extended family has already arrived. Should we call first?

I was thinking of taking a food platter, paper plates, forks, etc. Would that be appropriate?

So the main questions..since I seem to be all over the place here...

1. He passed away yesterday, when should we visit? Today, tomorrow, or some other day?

2. Do we call first or just show up?

3. Is food the best thing to take?

Thanks for the advice. This is a first for us.

Regards,

mari

Answer 1

You are being very thoughtful.   Something simple to eat would be lovely, along with the paper products.  Just drop by and stay only a very few minutes.

Answer 2

Drop off some food and a nice card. Do not ask to go in, do not ask to see the family, do not ask to stay.

Answer 3

I think you should follow your heart and visit now.  Don't call first, but be prepared to stay just a few moments if it isn't the right time for a visit.  They will be touched that you thought of them, even if they can't really talk with you.  I really like your idea of paper plates, silverware, etc.  Also coffee, coffee filters, sugar, cream.  This is very thoughtful and better than food.  Put a little note with it so you can leave it even if they aren't home.

Answer 4

I would call first before visiting and ask if they need anything.  They might just need some time and if everyone else drops food off they might just need someone or someplace to store it all.

Answer 5

in my opinion it is better to call first and i think u don't have to bring food with u just sit with them

Answer 6

That is very thoughtful of you.  If you know extended family is there is you go over someone will answer the door and you can at least drop whatever off with a card.  There will be lots of loose ends to tie up. Giving them a casserole or something would be alleviate a burden of cooking.

Answer 7

call first, then visit, dropping off a dish.

Answer 8

You can go over there during the daytime when someone is home, you can bring food, etc always welcome because the last thing they can do is cook or prepare food, you don't need to call, just stop by and let them know they are in your thoughts, hand them the platter and if they invite you in go for a few minutes, see how it goes, and if they don't just let them know you are available if they need anything.