Friend sick and avoiding everyone.?

Question

I am worried about a close friend who has been sick for the past month now. She says that she is fine in the morning, then in the afternoon she feels like death comes over her. She is on antibiotics but they are not working. Her doc is doing the full run of tests.

For the past month at every social event she shuns away. At mass she leaves right after receiving the Eucharist - and will not attend any parties or events. Even in converstation she ends any start with a simple yes or no answer.

I am the ONLY friend she has spoke with in the past month. And, at that for like 5 minutes on the phone (after my surgery). Usually she is so on top of everything and sends cards. I was in the hospital for a week - and nothing. Just very odd.

Today first time meeting in four weeks and no conversation. Avoided everyone. Left early. Not typical.

Could this be serious? And, how do I approach her? I am worried (won`t answer house phone)...should I call her mother in law? Would it be too instrusive? She is my closest friend...and I know something is going on...but don`t want to p**s her off...

Answer 1

Isolation can be early symptom of agoraphobia and fear. Since you are good friends, I recommend you have serious conversation about what she is feeling and why has she changed so dramatically.  It might p**s her off for the moment but this type of confrontation is what friends are for.

Answer 2

She's under a doctor's care, so she is getting the proper tests. If she feels bad all the time, she really doesn't feel like socializing. She cannot put her focus on your sickness when she is dealing with her own. Cut her some space.  

If she is indeed your closest friend, send her a note to let her know you are there, and give her time. She may be seriously ill. When I'm sick I just want to get in bed and pull the covers over my head. Be a friend and just love her and trust that she will come around when she is able.

It might be nice to leave a little gift on her doorstep. Maybe some packaged soups in a basket, with some nice bread or cookies? Many days I would guess she prefers to avoid eating just because she has to fix it herself.  

Answer 3

Call her mother in law, this sounds like something serious. It'll make sense because you're a concerned friend. By now you shouldn't be worried about being intrusive, just make sure your friend is okay. Everyone will understand.