Friendship with medical problem question?

Question

ok i want honest answers (but for God sake at least be nice) i am aware we are all different but some opinions and advise will make me feel better (i think) anyway here it is. i have panic attacks. sometimes severe and i need help from my friends. like today i needed my friend to take my sons to school. i felt bad, but i stayed at her house and watched her young ones while she was gone. to return the favor i got her kids ready, gave them breakfast and did her dishes. how do some of you feel with friends with disabilities, would you find it a nuisance and not want to be friends with someone who needs help, maybe 3-4 times a month. and i ALWAYS do something for her to thank her. i dont want to loose friends, i have lost some, but why?? is it that big of deal to people to go out of their way to help a friend in need

Answer 1

I think it's a good screener- Only your true friends will stick by you and help you out whenever you need it.  That's what being a friend is, right? =)

Answer 2

I love the few people I call friends like I love my family.  I have helped them many times when they needed it.  What kind of person would you be if you couldn't help a friend that truly needed it?  If this person is a true friend she understands.  It might be helpful if you do something for her one day that isn't done in return for something she has done for you.  Something that lets her know how thankful you are that she is your friend.  

Answer 3

Actually I have friends who need me more often than others but as I tell them a true friend does not have a problem helping you out. As long as you are requesting her help because you truly need it and not using your friend it isn't a problem.  I say you have a very awesome friend. It is also very nice of you to do little things for her when she does go out of her way.

Answer 4

If they are true friends it shouldnt matter my friends help me go to the bathroom all of the time because i have only three fingers

Answer 5

Hmmm, here are some ways I can see why you might be losing friends.

1. Helping friends in need is part of friendship. However, your needs are very sudden and require your friend to drop everything to help you right away. This is very difficult for those with busy lives with many obligations. And since it happens about once a week, they are probably just waiting for the shoe to drop again. In this way, you are very high maintenance.

2. Some might just not see your attacks as medical and unpreventable. They might not see why you don't just get in the car and take your kids to school. They may see it as you being drama.

3. People help those who help themselves. I don't know you, so I don't know if this is an issue with you or not. Do you see a doctor to get these attacks under control. Do you take medication for this?

4. I would rather feed my own kids and wash my own dishes than get interrupted, change my plans, and take your kids to school. So of course, your attacks are a nuisance, that is just a fact. But that doesn't mean that aren't worth being friends with. But consider that perhaps you aren't doing enough to make up for the help that you are getting.

None of this was meant in a mean spirit. I'm just trying to show you a more objective view of your circumstance.