Funny Golf Expressions...?

Question

Here are some:

An OJ Simpson - When you hit a bad shot and somehow get away with it.

A Bin Laden - When you hit a shot that's driven out of bounds, never to be found again.

A Vinnie Jones - When you hit a shot and get a kick when you weren't expecting it.

A Jamie Oliver - You really want to smack it but you can't.

A Gerry Adams - A provisional.

A Calista Flockhart - When you hit a shot thin but it is still pretty.

A Saddam Hussein - When you hit from one bunker straight into another.

A Lawrence of Arabia - When you or a playing partner have been in the sand all game.

A David Beckham - When you choose the wrong club.

Ice cream on s**t - When you sink a 30 foot putt for an eight.

A snowman - When you score an 8 on a hole.

A condom - When you hit a shot that didn’t feel very good but it is safe.

A masturbation shot - When you hit a golf shot that is not the right way of doing it, but the end result was quite pleasing.

Add any you know.

Answer 1

How about adding these to your funny list .....

A Union Member - When you hit just one shot, but it takes three hours to get it done.

A Roger Clemens - You take an eight on a hole, record a five and tell your partners they are all liars.

A CNN - Your shot goes way left.

A FOX News - Your shot goes way right.

A Bill Clinton - You keep hitting our ball in somebody elses hole.

A Cubbie - You play golf for 80 some years and NEVER win.

A Paula Abdul - You play your round drunk.

Answer 2

Playing in North Carolina with my " Rebel" Sales Manager, I managed to hit a few fairway irons right to the pin. His retort" Hey!! You are really making that dog Hunt".

Answer 3

Hey this is good stuff, I may use some of these during my next round.

Answer 4

The Virgin - A long wait for a pretty disappointing shot.

The Two Pump - It was satisfying for you and only you

The Bush - It looks good from where you are but when you

                    get closer it's pretty hairy.

The Fish - You get halfway through your round and it just

                  goes horribly wrong.

The Poppy - When you take relief and no one knows until

                      after (Seinfeld).

The Brush Burn - The stroke where you decide whether to

                              keep going and finish it off or just call it a day.

Answer 5

When one of our fellow competitors hits a putt that races past the hole and doesn't stop til it's ten feet by or more.  We say he has a case of "DSB".  They always ask "What is DSB?",

Of course it is "deadly sperm buildup" because it went off in his hands.