Funny joke i heard a while back

Question

There is this married couple that have been married for many years. one night they were laying in bed next to eachother and decided to play a game they hadn't played in years, its called football farts. the husband goes first and farts a nice quick f**t. the husband says "field goal, 3 points."

next the wife works up a good f**t and lets it rip, the covers fulttered from the breeze. the wife says, "touchdown with 2 point conversion. im winning 12-3"

the husband dosent like to lose so he trys and trys for about 10 minutes to win the game, meanwhile the wife had fallen asleep. finally the husband farts and accidently crapped in the bed. so he rolls over nudges his wife and says, "half-time. switch sides"

Answer 1

hahaha..

Answer 2

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services.

He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"

Answer 3

Do you actually have a question? I'm not trying to be mean, but this site is for questions, not to chat.

Answer 4

lol i love jokes about p**p and farts

Answer 5

hahahahaha.....nice.

Answer 6

not so funny. I heard one similar to it. Sorry, it's a bit dirty.

An old couple is lying in bed on the night of their 50th anniversary, and the woman, who has had a wonderful evening, looks at her husband and says:

"Darling, you've given me a wonderful day, and I love you so much. So it's my turn to give you the best evening of your life. What do you want more than anything in the world?"

And her husband, who always was a bit of a naughty guy, decides that he wants a *******, since he hasn't gotten one in several years. And so the wife, full of love for her husband of fifty years, agrees and goes down on him.

As soon as the wife finished, the couple is lying in bed and the husband is so pleased, because it was exactly what he wanted- the perfect present. As his wife gets up to clean off, the man touches her arm. He stares at his wife and says:

"Honey, that was amazing, you made me feel like a young man again. What can I do for you?"

The wife grins really wide and says: "I want you to kiss me right this very second."

Answer 7

Gross, but funny...!

Answer 8

hahahaha.... nice one...