Future USMC Wife has questions for Marine Officers!?

Question

me and my fiance are getting married in 2 years. we are both going to college in NYC but he is interested in joining the Marine Corps. he is doing N ROTC to become an officer of the Marine Corps. He hasn't taken his ASVAB yet but i want him to do a job that is the least dangerous, but he wants some action. is there any in between that can satisfy what we both want? i love him dearly and i would hate to have a knock on my door one day with dreadful news.

also, we want to start a family, but i don't want my child to move constantly and have no stability. is there housing in New York??

AND, how many times will my fiance have to leave and for what and for how long????

please help, i need to mentally prepare my self on what lies ahead, and the only way i can do that is if i know everything.

__thank you!

Answer 1

I understand how you feel, but here is the first thing you need to learn:

You can't make plans being in the military.  Some people move every 2-3 years, some people stay in one place their entire enlistment.  As an officer, he is assigned to a unit, and his job varies by that unit.  He may have an MOS, but I've had several company commanders that led companies that had nothing to do with his MOS.  As far as how often he will be gone, and where he will go- no one knows.  There are people who are deployed every other year, and there are people who are never deployed.  

The only thing certain in the military is uncertainty.  It's going to be difficult for you, but you really can't make those types of plans.  As far as your child having no stability- that is far from true.  They may move alot, but they develop friends where they are and base schools are usually pretty good.  Their teachers understand what they go through with all the moves, so they can help with stuff.

It's not an easy life, but it can be a good one if you make it that way.

Answer 2

Military Police

Answer 3

The Marine Corps is serious business, Every Marine is trained for combat and expected to fight when it comes down to it.

Every single Marine Corp MOS is a combat MOS. Not a single person is excluded from being sent to combat. Because of this doctrine, the Marines dont have any of their own medical services or any other service that cannot or will not fight.

You will usually be at a base for a few years at a time, Which is pretty stable, but at any moment he might be called up to deal with a situation.

The Marines are the expeditionary force of the US military, they are always ready to fight, and are the first people sent into a conflict. They are not as powerful as the army, but their purpose is to stop any gaps the enemy has created in our defenses, which requires a great deal of tenacity and ferociousness. They have to be tough enough to close the line.

Answer 4

Officers get moved around more than many enlisted. I had 3 CO's in one 13 month deployment. Officers normally sign on for 6 years. Not sure about the housing issue. I don't believe you can stay at one base (in base housing) while your husband is stationed at another base (inside the States). For a child, getting to see a lot of different places can be great. My wife was an "Army brat" and loved seeing the world. Good luck with this and I hope you get the answers you want.

Answer 5

Lady in Love, you have some huge misconceptions about the military life.  If your fiance chooses a MOS based on the perceived safety of the job he'll be miserable.  Better to pick one based on what he likes to do.  Every MOS has the potential to go into more dangerous situations so if he's going into the military you just have to prepare for all eventualities as best you can.  That means you make sure both your wills are up to date, the life insurance is adequate and that you enjoy every second you have together to the fullest.  Actually that's a good lesson to learn in civilian life, too, because you never know when an accident might take your loved one from you.

I don't know how often your DH would have to deploy or leave you.  But I do know that if you want to stay in NY for "stability" that it will be much more often.  The military puts it's people where they need to be.  He'll have to go where ever he has orders.  You can stay where ever you want to live.  That probably won't be base housing in NY (even though it's there) unless his duty station is in NY.  Once he transfers away from a base the housing office doesn't have to let you stay.  You can ask to, and usually they will try to work with you, but if they have a waiting list for people stationed at that base they won't be willing to have you there too long.  Your best bet, if this is the course you decide to take, is to buy or rent on your own.

If you can't tell, I don't like the idea of living separately from your military DH.  I don't like it for a lot of reasons.  First, he only gets one BAH (Basic Allowance for Housing).  When you live separately you have to use it to cover two households which is very expensive.  Second, a marriage is supposed to be a partnership.  I don't see much working together when couples are apart all the time.  Third, the military deploys so often anyway that time together is precious.  If you don't want to spend what time you can together why the heck get married?  Forth, stability isn't just living in the same place, going to the same school.  It's also knowing dad.  Knowing that he may have to leave for his job but will always come home.  Knowing that mom is there and knowing that both mom and dad are committed to being together.

I don't mean to make this sound as harsh as it does.  But really, it takes an amazing amount of work to be a successful military wife.  If you go into it expecting it to be easy you lessen your chances of making it.

Answer 6

ohhhh sweety you have no idea, i'm not trying to insult you because how would you know? no you are not going to be stationed in NY, he will not get to pick his duty station, i don't want anything to happen to my husband either but i understand he is in the military and if they need him to fight he will and i will support him,  my husband is a plane mechanic but he still gets deployed to the middle east, the surge is working so iraq is MUCH better then it was, your fiance could be deployed from a couple a weeks to a year, and multiple times, if he wants to go in as an officer he needs a bachelors degree and he has to graduate with at least a 3.0, if you get married you could be stationed across the world with him for years at a time far away from your friends and family,  he WILL get deployed even if the recruiter tells him he won't (they don't know) and you will have to stay behind, take care of all the bills, house maintenance, cars, everything, you have to be VERY independent to be a military wife, if this is something he truly wants to do please support him, you don't want him to have any regrets, good luck to you