Getting a divorce while being deployed overseas?

Question

My husband (who's deployed in Iraq) is threatening to get a divorce if I got after his BAH (basic allowence housing) pay that I haven't been getting from him for the past 8 months. I called some people dealing with this and one of the main Sgts told me that they are not allowed to file for divorce while they're overseas. He also told me that if I go after his money, he'll go to court and take everything I have in my name (my car and house). Does he have any grounds to do this and can he file for divorce? My husband is a habitual liar just to get out of sticky situations and I think he's lying to me once again. I'm looking for professional adivce!

Answer 1

Talk with a Jag on post and get some advice from the military court.

Answer 2

Unfortunately you did not provide the state in which you live as this would greatly influence the yes and no's of this question. In most states you have no fault divorces which means no matter who is at fault then everything acquired after the marriage is divided 50-50 (except the children, of course). But other states do things alot differently. Approach this on two fronts. One talk to Military Affairs for Dependents of Soldiers to learns what your rights are as defined by military codes of conduct. Secondly contact a civilian lawyer advocacy group or ombudsman for explanation of rights and procedures in the area from which you live. The phone numbers for help are located in the front of your phone book. Make some calls and get informed. This can be done without names and without compromising your position. Make him man up and take care of his responsibilities but I am not going to be too hard on him as he is a soldier defending my rights to be an opinionated so and so. Good luck ma'am.

Answer 3

He can't file for divorce overseas and if you had the house and car or anything else before marriage he can't touch that either.

Answer 4

He probably is not able to divorce you while he is deployed and the sargeants are just plain liars!

The reason he gets BAH is for the provision of his dependents - NOT FOR HIMSELF!

You should file for the BAH, as that is YOURS.  He will not even be able to contest that in court - even if he were not overseas.

He could not go to court and take everything that is in your name - the most he could get is half, if you are in a community property state!

He would not be able to do any of this while he is deployed.  By the same token, you would have to wait until he returns from overseas, if you wanted to divorce him.

You should go to JAG - but not for legal assistance.  Take your marriage license and if possible, one of his LES's.  Show them that he is collecting BAH and you are not getting it - and make them fix it!

Answer 5

The BAH is for support of the family not the military sponsor. He can not take anything that is in your name. You need to get in touch with his Commander and no one else.