Getting confidence back after having a baby?

Question

Before I had my son, 18 months ago, I had a busy life. One of my great loves was dance. I took weekly ballet classes and also classical Indian dance, taking two or three classes a week and performing, it was something I was passionate about.

I gave up dancing a few years ago and for the past year or so have wanted to go back. But I've just lost my confidence! For one thing I just don't have the time or energy that I used to have in my pre-baby days, and I'm so out of condition (luckily I'm still slim and toned but I get out of breath waking up a hill these days!). Many of the people I studied with have moved on become professional and are doing great things, but at 36 with a child I know I'll never do that now.

Every week I tell myself I'll just go along and take a class and every week I bottle out (or make excuses, ie childcare).

How to get out of this rut? Is it normal to lose yourself like this after having a baby? And how to kick myself in the backside and take the plunge

Answer 1

I felt the same way after several months of depression. I got my confidence back by enrolling in a college course.

I'm now also having music lesssons and exercise classes - yes, it did take some time to tell myself to get out there, but it was worth it in the end.

And don't most courses have a creche now?

Answer 2

Why don't you teach dance class that would increase your confidence.  Maybe work with small children and then work your way up. Then maybe you could bring your child.

Answer 3

Its normal to feel that way after being out of the ratrace for so long.Theres only one answer and thats to push yourself to get back into it, it'll be daunting at first but after your first class I bet you'll be excited telling your partner & son all about what you did and you'll have your drive and confidence back.

Its different but I felt like that about working again, i was so nervous and my hubby had to push me out of the door the first day, when i got home I was on cloud 9 and now its second nature, like i've never been out of work.

So kick yourself out of that door & get some of yourself back!

Answer 4

Promise yourself that you will do it.  Dont make any excuses.

Also, YOU GO GIRL for remaining toned after having a baby.

Answer 5

Yes, this is very normal. My son is now 2 years old and I am just now feeling like myself again and that is only because I took the intiative to take my life back (LOL).

I started doing simple things that I used to enjoy. If you don't start somewhere it may never happen. Take your time with it but remember you only live once. Go join the ballet classes no excuses.  I gurantee you will be a happier mother, and a happier YOU!

I hope this is a bit of encouragement.**

Answer 6

Just go along once!!!!! The first time is the hardest....but you'll have a great time...realise you can still keep up, and you'll find it easier to go the next time.

It's like anything.....you talk yourself out of it before you start...(dieting, exercising, talking to someone special, etc)

Take the plunge......maybe reward yourself if you go the first time....ie....if I go, i'll treat myself to a massage as a reward, or a new handbag, etc.......

You're a mum now....you want your child to grow up with a "go get it" attitude....so you need to model that behaviour yourself!

Good luck...you can do it!