Give away your newborn through Adoption?

Question

Why did you give up your child?

How long has it been?

Do you regret giving your birth child away?

if you could do it again, would you give him/her up?

Answer 1

Reasons: too complicated to get into here.

When: six and a half years ago.

Regret: yes, deeply regret it.

If I could do it again: nope, wouldn't relinquish; I'd parent.

Answer 2

I gave up custody of my child...She was 6 months old when was taken because the court deemed me as a transient. I had no where to appropriate to live with her.  I  had a chance to get her back and that was what I wanted to do...The judge at hearing told me that I had to have a full time job and place of my own for a year before I could even THINK of getting her back...A year later I was working 3 jobs and was still living with my mother...We couldn't keep the baby there since my mother was already raising my cousin's  child who was only 4 at the time and there wasn't enough room.  Caitlin had been living with her paternal grandparents for over a year when the told me they wanted to adopt her.  It took me a few months, but I finally agreed and signed the paper work.  Would I do it again...Yes. Because she deserves the best life can give here and unfortunately I wasn' t able to give that her. I regret the situation that I was in while I had her, but I don't regret letting her go. it was the best thing for her.

Answer 3

I gave up my daughter because her dad and I broke up and he was/is dangerous.  He has been in and out of jail for threatening to kill a woman and her kids, the list is long, that's just one issue.  She is almost 18 years old.  I have had heartache but am glad she has her parents, they are wonderful.  I would do it again.  It was a private adoption.  They have sent me stuff through the years, and when my mother died 3 years ago, they came to the funeral, our "first" meeting.  We email each other about once a month and I stay in contact with her mom.  We spent about 3 hours at their home this summer.  She is great and knows that I did it to keep her safe.  She was my 3rd child.

Answer 4

a child deserves their parents. Poverty is never a reason to lose your parents. May I suggest asking the adoptees how THEY feel about being adopted?

Answer 5

I was 21 and in college.  It was 1986.  I regret not knowing my son, but I don't regret giving him a wonderful life.  I chose his parents....through confidential files and a lawyer of course.  I made the right decision.  Under the same circumstances , yes I would do it again.  Now, at my age, no.  But I have the means to support a child and myself now.

Answer 6

i myself am adopted and recently turned 15.

The adoption process is a very miraculous for the people who are adopting. They have a chance to bring up life into the world. It is also hard for the person letting go of the child. I was adopted by a L*****n couple who loved children so much and chose me! I have now been with them for 8 years and it definetly wasn't a perfect time. It was definetly hard to grow up with them especially because of all the stereotyping and stuff, but im glad that i am who i am today. I am personally happy i got adopted considering the fact that my mother was a crackhead, and my father a drunk. I think people should seriously think if there is any other way that that person can support there child, bacause adoption is such a llooooooonnnnnnnngggggggggggg process. I had to go through 17 foster homes and 3 shelter experiences before it finally happened. Just remember....

REALLY THINK ABOUT IT!!!!

Answer 7

Gershom - I'm thrilled that I was adopted.  My biological mother was a psychotic nutjob who abused me.  

To answer the original question, I think it was more common years ago to hide the adoption.  It was seen as something to be ashamed of.  

Now, people know that it's not a horrible thing.  Open adoptions are encouraged by adoption professionals (at least the good/ ethical ones).  People are fighting to open closed records and winning.  

More needs to be done in the adoption industry.  It's not perfect by any stretch - but it has come a long way.

Answer 8

Why did you give up your child?

I placed my son because I wanted him to have a more stable home then I could provide. Homeless, no support, emotionally abusive boyfriend, no job. They were all temporary situations that I chose a permanent solution for.

How long has it been?

Six and a half years

Do you regret giving your birth child away?

Everyday

if you could do it again, would you give him/her up?

If I could get a “do over” I would parent. I was lucky that the agency I went through offers life time counseling for the adoptee and birthmother.

Answer 9

Gershom - I too am thrilled I was adopted.

I gave my son up 21 years ago  - December of 1986.  His birthday is December 17th.  I regret getting myself into those circumstances.  I loved him.  There was no way to keep him at that time.  I was 17 and very immature and naive.

Would I do it again?  If the circumstances were the same, yes, I would.  I believe what I did was the right thing.  I hope to meet up with him again if that is in the Plan.

Answer 10

It was 1972, 'people' said it was best for everyone.

She will be 36 in jan.

I regret it.

If i could do it again I wouldn't do it. It's a hurt that never heals.