God, i messed it all up...?

Question

i feel so pathetic writing this. i dont want to. i just want to tell someone, write it down somewhere. Sorry for being so... y'know.

This is about my BEST friend in the world Fletcher - yeah, he's a guy. Well, technically my best friends are Amy and Katie, but im a lot closer to him, hes my best friend and we all know it, in a way. Anyway, he's really special to me, he'd do anything for me, and id do the same for him. ive told him EVERYTHING. if he ever wanted to know anything, then i just told him, even in situations where i would have lied to anyone else. i've never lied to him, its like i can just trust him, no matter what.

So, a few nights ago i was sleeping at katie's. She said some c**p about how much he cares about me, and that he looks at me in a way that says he cares. She kept saying that he must love me as more than a friend. i just said that she was talking c**p. As the night went on, i started thinking about when hes messing about with girls, and if he's got a girl on the go, and i realised how insanely jealous of them i was. i kept thinking about more things, and i told katie, and we both kind of realised that i like him as... more. i dont want to feel like this. At all. it could have been ANYONE but him.

i thought, i can't lie to him, i'll tell him, it's nothing big, i'll get over it and we'll still be friends, but its... worse now. it just keeps getting worse and worse, and now i just want to see him. i want him to put his arm round me, like he does when im upset. i can't tell him this. he'd freak out, im sure of it. its blown out of proportion, and i don't know what to do. ive never lied to him before, especially not about something like this. i cant stop thinking about him. how much i want to see him, how much i want to talk to him, laugh with him, be his girlfriend... it'd be ok if it wasn't for the last line. ive messed everything up. my best friend, and i want to ruin it. And i cant even tell the person i want to tell most in the world. if i told him what ive been thinking, nothing would ever be the same, and i couldnt stand that.

Sorry i sound so cheesy, but i just cant help it. i want to see him sooo much, but when i do i'll have to lie to him, and i'll never be more than a friend to him anyway. i just cant believe i messed it up so badly...

Answer 1

You don't sound cheesy...lol. I have the same problem. I like this kid. My best friends friends friend. I told him and now everythings still the same. Were still friends. I also have a best friend that lives next door to me. He knows I think hes cute. so what. Its really just a phase for you. When girls get close to guys, they start to love. Their love is not a "like" love, but more of a family love. Girls think they cant love a guy as family, so they think they like them. Plus, I believe your in your teens? That means that your friends and you are boy crazed-maniacs. You start to fall in love with most boys you see.....trust me...Im like that too...Its okay, and you SHOULD tell him. Hes your friend, and he might feel akward for awhile, but he'll be okay.

Answer 2

ok ive been there done that and trust me you need to tell him or you will go crazy specially if you see him with another girl if he cares about you the way you say he dose then he will be cool with it long time friends sometimes become the best relationships in the end and they last forever even if you dont tell him to his face wright him a letter or email so you dont feel embaressed otherwise your lieing to him and thats not cool mabye he feels the same way but you will never know till you try just talk to the guy ive been with my b/f for almost 2 years and we were long time friends before that so trust me just talk to to the guy  

Answer 3

I have a little song that might help you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EqBD_rmIU...

(just switch the roles and its kind of like your situation.)

Do you want to go on with your life, wondering if it would of work out? If you truly like him, then tell him how you feel, or it will eat away at you in the future.  If i were you i would tell him!!!

"You and i

I know that we cant wait

And I swear, I swear its not a lie girl

Tomorrow may be too late

You, you and I girl

We can share a life together

Its now or never

And tomorow may be too late

And, feelin the way I do

I dont wanna wait my whole life through

To say Im in love with you "

-Amanda by Boston-

I hope this helped!!! Good luck

You are very welcome!

Ps: you did not mess it up. this may just be the best thing to ever happen to you! Who knows. You were dealt this hand, and you need to play it. Who knows if you will win. If you fold, then you may never know if you would have been a winner

Answer 4

It's difficult and confusing... and there's always the risk of s******g up the friendship, I know. But any true friendship can survive a situation like this. It may be that he won't return your feelings, and yet, if you bottle them up it will just torture you until you blurt it out anyway. Isn't it better to say it now and spare yourself all that torment? At least then you'll know the truth.

Take him aside and just be honest with him, no matter how hard it is. It will be really hard, but in a good and cleansing way. Keep it vague if that's easier. Tell him you're having feelings for him that you never expected; tell him that he means a lot as a friend and you don't want to s***w it up, but that it didn't feel right to hide it from somebody who you want to trust with who you really are.  If he's really the terrific guy you think he is, then he will do anything but turn away from you, even if he can't feel the same. And then you'll have the understanding of a friend, and of how much he really does care about you no matter what.