Good quotes, anybody?

Question

anyone know any really good quotes, funny ones that cheer you up?

Answer 1

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. - Lily Tomlin

"Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.  George Carlin

"If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia." Thomas Szasz

"I sometimes go to my own little world, but that's okay, they know me there." - Joel Hodgson

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin

"I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally."- W.C. Fields

How many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my hand.

Emo Philips

A fly without wings would be a walk.  Unknown

Answer 2

"I hope the end is joyful and never to return!" - Frida Kahlo