Grammar and punctuation help?

Question

how does this sound? should i change anything or add anything? and I know I probably need help with punctuation I have never been good at it

Parenting The Worst Job Ever:

sleepless nights are a common thing when you have a child. For the first six months I was woken up up at least once a night and for the first three months I was woken up multiple times a night. p**p is a four letter word that i dread. I have had to clean it off of beds, floors, doors, skin, toys, and much, much more. I don't know why but p**p never seems to stay in a child's diaper. Privacy is a luxury that I as a parent don't have. When I go to the bathroom it seems that my child has to follow me. When I cook he holds on to my leg. Currently he is sitting on my lap saying a, c, d, e, and b the few letters he knows. Another draw back to being a parent is that you work what seems to be twenty four hours a day and get payed no money for all the hard work you do, but in return you get hugs and kisses which are way more valuable to me than money.

Answer 1

Parenting: The Worst Job Ever

When you have a child, sleep becomes a thing of the past. For the first three months I was up every two hours, for the next three, it was every four. I became the walking dead.

p**p is the thing, though: in the bed, on the floor, on doors, skin, toys ... wherever it would stick, except, of course, in his diaper. Privacy is a long-lost luxury. When I go to the bathroom, he follows me in; when I'm cooking he holds my leg. Right now, he's sitting on my lap saying his ABCs ... well, the first five anyway.

Does it pay well? Twenty-four-hour days for hugs, kisses and all the love you can handle. The worst job I've ever had, and, paradoxically, by far the most rewarding.

Answer 2

Punctuation, grammar, and a few other edits. Here is how I would re-write it if I was your editor. Avoid using contractions and 'you' in papers. You only use 'you' if you are giving instructions to someone on how to do something (e.g. building a tree house). Your punctuation/grammar also needs a lot of work, but you already know this.

Parenting: The Worst Job Ever;

Sleepless nights are a common thing when a person has a child. For the first six months, I was woken up at least once a night, and for the first three months, I was woken up multiple times a night. p**p is a four letter word that I dread. I have had to clean it off of beds, floors, doors, skin, toys, and countless other surfaces. I do not know why, but p**p never seems to stay where it is suppose to be, a child's diaper. Privacy is a luxury that I, as a parent, do not have. When I go to the bathroom, it seems that my child has the obligation to follow me. When I cook, he holds on to my leg. Currently, he is sitting on my lap practicing his alphabet. Another draw back to being a parent, I work what seems to be twenty four hour days, and I get payed no money for all the hard work I do. However, in return I get hugs and kisses, which are way more valuable than money.