Guilty thoughts driving me CRAZY!!?

Question

Okay so I am 5 months pregnant and 2 days ago I got randomly sick and didn't have much of an appetite. I had this random thoguht go through my mind as I heard my husband stifling around in the cupboard for food and it was "He doesn't deserve that food." I started crying immediatley because I couldnt believe that had even ran through my mind I NEVER have thoughts like that.. I've told him and my stepmom who works in a doctors office what they think and they said well its probably because you didnt feel good that day and felt kinda resentment towards him that he felt great enough to eat and you didnt... But since then I have been feeling guilty everytime we eat, not because that thought comes back but because it reminds me that I had that thought and I feel so guilty.. My sister is coming to stay tomorrow night and im scared "what if that thought goes through my mind again?" Any ideas? Dont tell me I'm crazy.. We all have bad thoughts right :(?

Answer 1

Don't be hard on yourself.  We do all have bad thought from time to time.  You didn't feel good - it's no big deal that thought went through your head.  You didn't speak up and yell "Get your *** out of the kitchen!!! You don't deserve any food while I'm sitting her feeling like c**p!!!", did you?  You could feel guilty if you had yelled that - but as it is you just thought it and didn't speak up or act on it by going in and kicking his ***.  You shouldn't feel guilty at all.  

Answer 2

honey it's called imbalance hormones especially at 5 months . its totally normal to go thru stages like that during and after your pregnancy. they will be days you cant stand him and blame him for making you that way. it will pass. just be patient and thats where his patience comes in at also. and remind yourself its only hormones and it will pass. GOD bless you and congratulations.

Answer 3

relax it's not that big a deal.  I have thoughts like that all the time!

Answer 4

Everyone's mind gets a little crazy during pregnancy. Don't worry about it too much. I knew someone who had dreams about giving birth to kittens. Don't freak out over one stray thought. Really, I have thoughts like that anyway and I'm *not* pregnant

Answer 5

abortion is not the answer. you got pregnant for a reason, there is a reason behind everything. this may be one of the most rocky next few years of your life, but you will learn so much and grow so much as a person, that in the end you will be glad for what you have.

You should have that baby and love that baby with all you have because he/she did not have the choice. but you can have that baby and grow him or her and feel the greatest accomplishment when that little baby that you birth grows into somthing spectacular because of what you taught that child.

Good luck on your decision. many people have bad thoughts, but you seem a little bit more concerned that other people i have come in contact with. maybe talk to someone about this. Someone with a degree in psychology.

Answer 6

Honey, you are pregnant and your body is trying to deal with huge surges in hormones.

Your thoughts will be affected.  In a couple of months, or sooner it will go away.

In the meantime, remember the guilt is not of an actual physical act, but of a brain super charged with hormones.

Answer 7

i think it has to do with the fact that you have so many hormones controlling you right now, that you might get emotional or overreact to small things. calm down and realize its normal.

youll be fine.

i promise.

Answer 8

your pregnant, you have mood swings. it happens

Answer 9

that's the reactive mind at work my friend i suggest you tell him then apologize to him for thinking it.

Answer 10

It may not be possible to remove the stress from your life, however managing your stress may help you to get things done. Below are some ideas for managing stress:

Go for a Walk or Run- Exercising can be a good way of relieving stress. It helps to get rid of all that pent up energy and can leave you feeling much calmer. Any sort of exercise can be good. You may want to go and kick a footy with friends or head to the gym.

Hang Out with Friends - If you are feeling stressed you may need to take your mind off things for a while. Hanging out with friends is one way of doing that. It may be that similar things that stress you out, also stress your friends out, and so talking about your problems with them may be helpful.

Taking Some Deep Breaths - Deep breathing can help to relax the body and hence calm you down. Taking deep breaths before an exam, game, job interview or before going on stage may help to calm you down and focus on what it is you are about to do.

Setting Realistic Goals - Becoming over-stressed may make it harder to keep things in perspective. Setting realistic goals (both for the short-term and long-term) and priorities and time management may be useful ways of managing your stress. You may want to check out the fact sheet on Stress at Exam Time, Time Management and Setting Goals for more information.

Have Multiple Options to Achieve your Goals - There is never just one way to achieve something. It's important not to put all your eggs into one basket - investigate and plan other ways to get to where you want to go, whether it's a uni degree, job, or holiday vacation.

Try to Avoid Smoking, Alcohol, and Caffeine - It may be tempting to use smoking and alcohol as a means of managing your stress. Try to avoid using these things as a way of coping, as in the long run they may make you more stressed out.

Watch What You're Thinking - Your outlook, attitude, and thoughts influence the way you see things. Is your cup half full or half empty? A healthy dose of optimism can help you make the best out of stressful circumstances. Even if you're out of practice, or tend to be a bit of a pessimist, everyone can learn to think more optimistically and reap the benefits.

Speaking to Someone - If you are finding you are always stressed and it is hard to carry on with day to day stuff, it may be helpful to talk to someone about it. Parents, teachers, a school counsellor or youth worker are people that may be able to help you cope.

Answer 11

GET AN ABORTION

NOW

Answer 12

your probably just cranky

don't get too overwhelmed over just a thought

if you really don't feel that way then it's no big deal

Answer 13

You're pregnant. You're hormones are going crazy. I know you feel guilty but you really shouldn't. I think your stepmom is right.

Answer 14

So what if you do think of it again?  It still won't make you a bad person.  In the end, what counts isn't so much what we think, but what we do about it.  You aren't stopping anyone from eating, so I don't see this as a big problem worth being guilty about.  Aside from that, you are pregnant.  Pregnancy does weird things to all of us- it's not just your uterus that is involved, it's your whole body, including your brain.  I used to get wiggy about dust bunnies under the couch and spills in the fridge.  I went off kilter over ketchup buildup inside the cap too.  Didn't make me a bad person then, still doesn't.  It's time to let this go, dear, and quit playing the "what if" game with yourself.  Odd thoughts happen to waft through everyone's head sometimes, and they are not bad people either.  It's not what you think, it's what you do.  And even then, pregnancy still plays with your head.  I went nuts for dust bunnies, after all.   Cried and claimed if my husband loved me he'd have gotten it when he vacuumed.  Then of course, sanity was restored.  You're fine.  Let it go.

Answer 15

Well yer i have had some thoughts luike that before but not in the same kind of way but there is n reason to really feel guilty about it but it is just one o fhem stupoid things that comes into your head if you know whjat  imean i just think that you should not feel guilty lol it sucks to have a guilty concence doesnt it lol

Answer 16

Its hormones.  Don't overstress about it.  At least you are conscious of it and you don't enjoy the bad thoughts.  And yes we all do have bad thoughts.  Its when you think of hurting someone or yourself is when it is a problem.  Again, don't stress about it and stop feeling guilty, you didn't hide the food from him you are not acting out on the thoughts.  your hormones are just unbalanced temporarily.