Guys make the first move?

Question

If girls are considered equal to us on every level then why is it that girls wait for guys to always make the first move in dating /relationships/asking out. Most girls like this and accept this as a great part of being a girl, but in essence doesnt this also mean they like being passive, and pursued and the men are the agressive ones that take control. I think its ironic how even feminists love this, but is really contradictory to everything they stand for. That women can do anything men can do. At the same time that they get to sit back and be pursued this shows that they still have the passive instincts of women that men take control. I still experience this with almost every girl Ive met even feminists.

Answer 1

Now that you put it that way...you do have a point.

Well I don't know what others think but this is my opion:

As long as there are no insults or pointing out of feminin "inferiority" we are fine.  I guess the reason why we wait for the guys to ask us out is:

A. we are to chicken

and

B. Its just the way its been done...and the way it will be.

I'm pretty sure lots of guys out there would love the girl to make the first move...but wouldn't it be a little strange...cause its unexpected.

Answer 2

in my opinion there is nothing wrong with the woman making the first move. i have done it, though, i don't do it often, it's always turned out successful to some extent. just depends i guess.

Answer 3

When I make the first move, I've had some negative reactions.

I had a woman on yahoo tell me to act like a lady and don't act like a man, and some guy whined about me being desperate to his friends for making the first move.

But hey, some people also like it though.  If you get negative reactions for making the first move from both men and women, chances are women won't want to do it again.

I've had a mix of negative and positive reactions from men that I made a move on.  Oh, and the two guys that got mad at me were g*y. I didn't know they were g*y though.

Answer 4

I've tried it both ways. My experience has been that the relationship goes better when I wait for the man to make the first move.

It is not my instinct nor my nature to be passive. My instinct is to go after what I want. In theory, it seems either gender should be able to initiate, it just doesn't seem to play out that way in reality.

Even if the man initially has a positive reaction to my advances, he seems to get lazy and uninterested pretty quickly if I initiate.

Answer 5

First of all, it's not our fault that you're shy and have a problem talking to women. If that's the case then that's a personal problem you need to get over.  Second, there's nothing wrong with a man making the first move, or a woman making the first move. Now, in my experience, some men have had a problem with me making the first move because they felt it was me being too aggressive and taking away from them being a man. So when I do sit back and wait, most of the guys hesitate until I initiate the conversation.

All in all, it's all about a person's comfort level. Is he/she able to talk to other people outside of their circle of friends; can he/she holds an interesting conversation? It just all depends on how the man or woman presents themselves when meeting the opposite s*x. Now days the playing field in dating has been leveled and women do approach men. If you feel this will take the pressure off of you when making a first impression then that's fine. But realize that not every woman wants to be the one to make the first move. We're just as much afraid of rejection as you guys are. But again, it all goes back to a person's comfort level.

It sounds to me like you have some issues talking to the ladies because only an insecure man would posse such a silly question (and then blame it all on feminist as usual) It's funny how most of you guys want to blame everything involving the personal discrepancies YOU have with women on feminist. I tell you, for people that we never really see on T.V. or protesting as you guys claim, feminist sure are busy. Most of you find a way to sneak feminist into every point you try to make in here. Even if it is just you being silly. And when is the last time you met a feminist? And how did you know she was feminist? did she flash a business card with "You local Feminist" printed at the top? Why do you guys try to make it seem like feminist are another breed of woman?