HE BROKE MY HEART AND NOW HE WANTS TO BE MY FRIEND?

Question

We were friends fro 2 years before we got together. Our relationship lasted 3 years and then out of the blue he broke my heart horrible, but even tho he hurt me so much i just cant hate him. A couple of months back we talked again and he said that he still cares about me that he wants to be my friend and i said i didn't have a problem with it. I know he is dating different girls and everything and even tho at the beginning it hurt me to know that, now I'm more relax about it. The problem is that it seems he just calls me when he has nothing else to do or he has any problem and he calls me for advice. He says that i can also count on him but i just try not to call him cause it hurts me when i talked to him and he is so indifferent. yesterday i asked him why he hasn't called for 2 weeks to at least say hi and he said that he has been busy with his friends, which i didn't like cause i thought i was his "friend" too. Then today he text me cause he has some problems and he is asking what i think he should do so I realized that he just calls me when his life is not going good and he needs help. I honestly don't know what to do . should i just not help him and tell him to go and ask his others friends or should i still be there for him.

Answer 1

You should tell him to ask his other friends!!  If the only reason he calls on you is to better his own life hes not worth your time.  He just taking advantage of you.

You could confront him about it.  Talking never hurt anyone.

Answer 2

leave it...keep yourself busy with other friends and make an excuse u were busy. Don't stick with him too much...he could b having a gf and how would u like it if your bf were to call a friend who is a girl so often?

Answer 3

This male sounds like he wants his cake and to eat it!! You know exactly what he is doing as you have said it already. He picks you up when he needs to sound off but when things are ok he is off with his "real" friends. Do you know of the singer Lily Allen and her song "Smile". This reminds me of your problem. There is a line in the song that goes "Now you call me up the phone so you can have a little whine and a moan but its only because you're feeling alone".

This guy needs to stop picking you up when he needs you and ignoring you when things are ok for him. Stop being the girl that fills in the empty void of not having a girlfriend. He is using you as a stop gap. I don't even think he is doing it maliciously, nevertheless he is still doing it.

Next time he phones because he says he has a problem, make up some excuse about being busy and you'll phone him when you can.  This shows you have a life that you are getting on with and one that doesn't revolve around his problems. He needs to stand n his own two feet. It would be interesting to see if he ever calls without a problem. If he does again, if he does you should say "Mate, we all have problems, can't we talk about something different for a change?". He might then ask about you and whats going on in your life. If he still doesn't get it, ditch him, he is clearly too self-centered  

Answer 4

leave him now cause he will hurt you more and more and begain another relation

Answer 5

As hard as this sounds, you have to slowly let go because he only comes around when he needs help and that is not fair to you and you don't deserve that.

If he calls, don't answer. Or if you have to answer, tell him that you're busy or just tell him straight up that you're tired of him looking for you when his life isn't great and he expects you to come and fix it.

Sounds like he doesn't consider you guys as friends, so you should just try to have fun and try to get him off your mind and eventually everything will be okay.