HELP! GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW AND I NEED THE FUNNIEST GROOMS SPEECH POSSIBLE! PLEASE WRITE SOME FUNNY LINES!

Question

Yes getting married tomorrow HELP!

LOOKING FOR EACH PERSON OR ONE PERSON TO WRITE THE FUNNIEST STUFF THEY HAVE EVER HEARD OF!

ID LIKE TO CRACK PEOPLE UP!

Answer 1

Tell the groom to take his wife by the hand and lead her out onto the dance floor. Then inform him that that is the last time he has control over anything in his life! My buddy's best man pulled that one. Pretty funny if it takes a while to do it (or you could have her jump up on a chair for dramatic effect)

Answer 2

I went to wedding recently were the groom started of his speech by saying

"I would like to thank my lovely wife (Insert name here) for letting me speak on the behalf of us for the first and last time..."

That got quite a few laughs

Answer 3

You can create a scenario where each table will have two fake keys assigned to s**y/lovely ladies (i'd say 10 at most, 20 if you can). Then have the groomsman say something like " well buddy, you're officially out of the bachelor pad and into the marriage pad". "Now it's time for those who has the keys to you house to turn it in". And then you'll have a bucket or something nearby and one by one on whichever table ladies would get up and drop it in the bucket. Save the last person as a grandma or a tomboy / flamboyant person for laugh. My thoughts :)

Answer 4

after biggin up the bride at the end of the speech put a confused look on your face and say you would go on only you cant read the rest of the 'brides name' writing, heard this at a wedding and it had everyone laughing

Answer 5

personally at a wedding i would rather it was romantic (im sure the bride would too)

Answer 6

this weddings so emotional even the cake was in tears,,

Answer 7

I was at a wedding a few weeks ago were the best man said ' Funny how history repeats it's self.  25 years ago they were sending (bride) to bed with a dummy now it's happening again!'  It got a lot of laughs!!!

Answer 8

An irish man, a protestant and arthur boruc are all giving one wish by a genie the irsh man wishes for ireland to always be forever fertile the genie makes it happen the protestant wishes for 4 million protestants in one country with a wall surrounding the country the genie makes it happen arthur boruc says tell me more about this wall the genie says the wall is 1000 feet tall no one gets in no one gets out arthur then says "FILL IT WITH WATER" lol

Answer 9

Well when my hubby was giving his lovely speech he started by saying "well everyone says Emma(my name) is going to wear the pants in this marraige,well we've talked this out and she is allowing me to wear them.But this morning was the last day i got to pick out my own pants,because from now on she will be doing that for me." That got alot of laughs because all of our family knows i cant go one day with out telling him what to do.

Answer 10

Typical male... the woman spends months on end planning every last detail of the wedding and the groom has a handful of duties and waits till the last min.