he broke up with me a month ago because we can't see each other because of the distance, he is leaving in texas and i am in mexico. we stayed together for about 2 years until we couldnt visit each other very often.
he loves me and i love him with all my heart and would marry him. he said hello a week ago on messenger and he told me that he would love to stay in contact with me and that he will visit me next year because i am going to study to another country maybe usa or canada still don't know yet. the thing is he said things not like saying i love you literally but i know he does and that was cool because he made me feel good and i thought we maybe could be together in the future.
yesterday night when i got home from a club i realized he called a couple of times to my cell phone and i called him back and he was really drunk but he said things like he wanted me to know how special i am to his life and that he loves me really much, he said he is really sad because his grandfather died 2 weeks ago and a good friend died 2 days ago :S and he used to live like 8 years with her.. so that is why he just wanted to say how much he loves me and that he has strong feelings for me because of all what we've been through and just in case he is not coming back, he just wanted me to know before is too late (i think he said that because of the deaths, because he couldn't tell them he loves them) and he also said he is going to afghanistan for a year soon :-S that really surprised me, he is in the army but he was leaving the army nex year!! never thought he could go again. so i cried very much when i was talking to him and i told him that i love him, and that this month has been really hard for me. i cant stand being away from him. i feel like i am loosing the love of my life.
one thing he said that confuses me is that he wants me to make my life and move on... i don't understand !! he said he loves me but don't want to be with me? he said he wants to stay in contact with me and maybe we could get back together in the future but he wants me to keep going with my life! how can i put away my feelings when all i want to do is be with him! i told him i really love him and that i'll wait for him i really don't care he is going to afghanistan, well i do care but just because i am afraid something could happen to him but i have no doubts about how i feel about him. i am a faithful woman.
today he got online and i told him i was really sad and afraid. and he said he doesn't remember what he told me yesterday but that nothing is going to happen to him and to don't worry. obviously i told him i DO CARE he is really important to me.. but he acted like indifferent... and he only said ok and left !
oh my god i don't know what to do anymore.. should i move on? i am so confused i love him and i don't want to lose him but why he is like rejecting me sometimes? why he is saying things like he loves me and calling me like that drunk and saying the same thing he said online.. that he loves me and then act like nothing happened.
help!!!
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