HELP!!! Please!!! Friend with low self-esteem..?!?!?!?

Question

Okay, I asked a question similar to this recently, but I didn't get many answers so............

I have this friend. She's always putting herself down. She just called herself a lunatic, a moron, and a loser. No matter how many times I deny her, she just continually says this kinda stuff.

How can I help her?

P.S. Please don't say, "she needs a counselor," cuz she won't see one

Answer 1

Stop denying her.  She doesn't have self esteem problems, she just wants attention and praise and compliments.

Stop delving them out at her request and she'll stop complaining.  No one can teach you self esteem, its something you learn yourself.

Go ahead and compliment her when she isn't crying out for it, but don't do it on her command.

Answer 2

You should have a talk with her mum and maybe she could help. Afterall her mum was once a teenager herself.

You should go shopping with her and buy new clothes, get nails done, new shoes, give each other make overs. Just fun stuff that girls should do! Remember to reward her with compliments..

You feel uncomfortable when friends have unhealthy self esteem, so do I, even though mine isn't over the top but around a healthy level. You should tell her that she should show more respect towards herself, and that she is not a loser, moron etc.. or maybe ask her why she feels that way.

I'm sure that many people go through this phase.. I'm sure I did, just be a good friend and a good listener. Try to remind her kindly that You only live once, so there's no time for putting herself down.

Answer 3

My friends always say omg im so fat and blah blah blah.

i always tell them there not cuz there not.

just be like seriously the next time u say it im just gonna agree cuz im tired of hearing this. your not a loser or a moron or a lunatic.

hope this helps!

Answer 4

Then you tell her mom. You tell her. Let her help. She can't do this alone. And you can't handle this alone.

She will be mad at you at frist but then she'll be thankfull and relieved.

Just keep reasuring and give a lot of compliments.

Answer 5

whether she consciouslyy knows it or not she is most likely vocalizing things like that in order to receive assurance from you or others that she is not a moron, loser or lunatic.  This are common signs of low self esteem and extremely common among adolescents.  she either feels like she needs to beat people to the punch, so to speak, out of fear that they will say those things first and hurt her, or she wants to know that you and others around don't agree.  As frustrating as it may be as a friend to hear that stuff, just be understanding.  Correct her when she says those things, make sure she knows how much you care about her, and that you love her.  This is a phase that will pass, but if nurtured can become a downward spiral.  Find ways that she can feel good about herself. Give her positive feedback for things she does well, even if it's just "your a good listener" or "a good friend"  

Answer 6

I think the best you can do is try to make her feel good about herself, and get other people in on it too, compliment her on her hiar or shoes, or say OMG< where did you geet that necklace or something..hope this helps!

Answer 7

umm....well.. this is a challendge. Well. Have her mother talk to her. or have a lilt TLC with her. like go to the spa. or something. getting your nails and hair dont or somthing