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HELP!!! Things are screwed up! WHAT do I do??? WHAT!?

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This is very long. But I would really appreciate it. Im in a very bad state at the moment. Your HELP is greatly needed. Thank you.

Five years ago...

I was in Grade 7 when he was in Grade 11. I knew him as he was the soon-to-be-graduate and 1 of the cool dude in our school. He was also in my brothers class. They were not really close but just classmates and would say Hi and...

Few months ago...

I finished my Grade 11 and am waiting 4 college. Im doing this part-time job as an interviewer and I met him there after 5 years. He didnt recognize me but when I told him abt my brother he was like 'Oh, you are his sister!' Its like a call center where I work and we sit together. We gradually got really close. We call each other everyday after work or on weekends and talk for hours. We text non-stop. Before we sleep and when we wake up in the morning. The problem is that he got a GIRLFRIEND. They are not on good terms and on the verge of break up but he wouldn't as she threatens to act stupid. Like DRINK and SMOKE her a$$ off. And he doesn't like that. He cares about her, obviously. We have kissed and we make out when we get the chance. Nothing more than that. He and his GF wouldn't talk for days and haven't met each other for weeks now...

He has been with her for about 2 years now. And he had given her a diamond necklace for her birthday a year ago. He is 22. He says that I mean alot to him... And he would love to be with me. I have waited for 2 months and we are still there. He didnt do anything abt it. I have talk to him abt it. Told him that we cant go on like this but... What do I do? How do I behave with him??

He says that I mean alot to him. He said im really nice and he would love to have a wife like me. He is planning to buy this really expensive digital camera for me (HK$2000) but I said no I cant accept something like that... He calls me such sweeet names. He takes me out for the movies, starbucks most of the times. Spends alot on me and he says I deserve all this. I asked him what I really mean to him and he said he doesn't wanna tell, he wanna keep it to himself!

His girlfriend knows nothing abt me...

I told him to either pick me or her and he said its YOU. I pick you.

But then he wouldn't break up with her.

But RECENTLY:

We have been just ignoring everything and have been like CLOSE FRIENDS... Its been quite long since we met but we talk on the phone everyday. The thing is that he talks to me whenever he gets the chance meaning not talking to his GF but me. I might mean more than her to him, right?

A few nights ago...

We went talking abt these things again... I asked him wht I really meant to him and he said he just cant tell me. I know im special and I mean alot to him. But I wanna hear it from him.

I asked him If I should move on and he said its UP TO YOU. He said why do girls think its necessary to have a guy all the time. He said if "you moved on than I will know I never was special to you."

He even said he doesn't see any changes in his life with him and his GF. The way he say they are is neither ON nor OFF.

I asked if he like 'me being his date' or 'me being a good friend'. He said he likes both.

I am just so confused. I told him I feel like im a 'tissue' being used by him and now thrown. He got really pissed off and hanged up the phone. He text me and said he doesn't llike me saying all this. I didn't reply and he called at 2:am to say sorry...

Today:

Im called for WORK again and we are gonna be there togther most of the times again. I'll be going soooon. A few days later probably.

How do I behave with him?

Im feel so much for him.

Im lost. I dunno what to do. Please help.

Thank you once again.

Ok...

What if i dont call him for a week or something?

But what should I do if he calls?

What if he doesn't call?

After telling him lets just be friends..

How do I behave with him?

Do I call him? How long should we talk on the phone?

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1 ANSWERS


  1. I don't think you should show too much of how you feel about him when he himself cannot even be transparent to you about his relationship with his girlfriend.

    I would advice you to try and keep your distance from him because you may just end up on the losing end here when you realize that he really loves his girlfriend that's why he couldn't break up with her easily.

    Words aren't enough to express love. If he really does love you, he won't make you dangle like a loose thread, waiting to be cut. Remember that he's still committed to someone else no matter which side you look at. He couldn't even do something about the two of you even if he's saying that he loves you and all.

    Don't cling too much on your feelings for him without weighing the whole situation. The heart makes you look dumb most of the time during this kind of situation.

    Love works best when both the heart and the mind are working together.

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