HELP??? i need advice?

Question

Am a 23 years old single young women with 2year old living wit my parents. My parents are very tough to live with.. no doubt that they are very loving and caring but when it comes to personal matter they get to much into my business. Everytime am on MY CELL phone my dad always have the nerves to ask who am i talkin to. When i go out he tends to call me to see wats up....Even going out late its an issue.. when 1130 pm hits my phone is blowing up...is like wtf am already 23...then i get so annoyed and i tend to get attitude with him and there isnt barely no communication among us. My thing is that i want to move out ASAP. Here comes the BUT.. My parents have become very attached to my son which is their grandson. I want to leave my house but that love they have for my son is holding me back. I;ve already started to look for apt but i havent told them i just feel so bad but am so ready to be on my own. I have a great job i got my car am pretty much set and ready. Everytime i tell me mom i want my own place she tells me things such as that is hard out there that i wont be able to do it on my own BLAH BLAH... she mostly says it so i;d stay with them but i wanna leave... my thing is that i dunno wat to do or how to tell them. Should i tell them that am lookin> or just wait till i find something then tell them?? IDK

Answer 1

If I was in your position I would make plans to move out making sure that you are able to handle it all on your own. If you go back to them for help you are in for a major I told you so. I think you may be happier n your own place, in the end it the happiness of your son and yourself that is most important to consider. Your parents can still have time with your son and retain a relationship but that should not be at expense of your happiness

Answer 2

Just find a place, put a deposit and then tell them. You're 23, they can't do anything about it. It's time you become independent.

Answer 3

Your parents are a bit over the top with their concern for you but I have no doubts that it is because they love and care for you.... if you are planning to move out I think it might be best to start dropping hints about your move, you will have to learn how to ignore there comments ...but try not get into any fights with them because I'm sure they will/are a great help for you and your son also it's good that your son has contact with his grand parents. You need to be very grown up and mature in the way you handle all of this , your parents will feel better knowing that you are a big girl  now and are quite capable of looking after yourself and your son.

Answer 4

Just tell them that you want to move out and show them that you could do it on your own.They can not tell you NO your 23 already.

Answer 5

You can't blame your parents for wanting to know where you are or when you'll be home. Even though you are 23, you are still living in their house, under their rules. If you want to move out, than move out. You don't mention this in your post, but I have to assume they are watching your son, which gives them that more of a reason to question where you are. They are the grandparents, they've raised their kids and shouldn't raise yours.

Not being preachy, but if you're a single mom of 1, your going out days are long gone. Your mom has a point, you will have food, daycare, electric, care, rent etc.

On one hand, you are 23 and old enough to move out on your own. On the other hand your only 23 and a single mother and it sounds like you have a lot of growing up to do.

Answer 6

Just because your son would no longer be living in their house doesn't mean they won't still love him and be involved in his life.

You should find a place of your own and move out.  Yes, it is hard out here, but if you're smart about it, you can make it work.  If you're going to depend on your parents to help out, then don't move out, you're not old enough.

Decide if you're mature enough and old enough to be on your own or if you prefer to live with mommy and daddy and shove your kid off on them so you can go out and stay out late.  Once you get your own place, there will be far less going out and staying out late unless you pay a sitter.  (Or unless your parents let you use them as doormats.)

Move out, sista!  Grow up and raise your son!