HELP is she really my friend what does everyone else think of my situation please??

Question

OK this is a very long story, cut very short. I have a best friend and we have known each other for 11 years. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and they get on great together.

The problem is, my boyfriend works away a lot, my best friend knows this and I am often left alone in the house while she ( the best friend) goes out partying/clubbing etc with friends that I knew from school, that she now works with. It’s just a coincidence that we all know each other now. They always ask about me to her and always ask me to go out, but the message is never passed on to me. And they often ask her for my phone number, which she has never given them. I found all this out the other day.

Is it selfish and clingy of me to be expected to be invited out?

The thing is my best friend lives not far from me with her parents, and she is often round mine for a coffee on a Sunday boosting about what a great night they all had. And if I ever arrange to go out with my other friends (which is not very often) she say’s ‘Oh I was going to ask you out that night the girls would love to see you, but you can come another time’

I love her to bits and she is so good in some ways, and she always turns to me if she ever has a problem. I have noticed she gets very nasty about me meeting new people also and hates any other friends of mine, who she doesn’t even know!!!

I have approached her about this on several occasions, but the subject gets changed or some silly excuse is made. For her 21st I was going to arrange a surprise party, she found out and called me. She was happy and seemed very grateful but decided she did not want the party and wanted to go out for a pub lunch with me during the day, and go out clubbing on the night with other friends of ours and basically leaving me at home alone again, and I spoke to her about it and it went in to a massive argument, she can be very aggressive. We all range between the ages of 19 – 23 (my best friend and I are both 22) I suppose the question I am asking today is what everyone else make of this situation. I really don’t know?

I know I have gone on, but honest I can’t talk to anyone else about this really. Just needed to get this off my chest. Any advice will be very much appreciated.

Thanks in advance.

Answer 1

I would distance yourself from her. I had to distance myself from someone I was very close to also, which sucked, but in the long run you realize that person is not enhancing your life at all. They are bringing you down. Go out with other people and don't worry about not being invited to go out with her. Sounds like she's jealous of you and what you have and what she does not have.

Answer 2

wow. that doesnt sound like a very good friend to me. i think that you should distance yourself from her. be friends but not best friends. if she is causing problems between friends, she might eventually cause problems between you and your man. watch yourself.

Answer 3

Cl-Cl-CLINGY!!!!