I would appreciate if you take the time to read this,i will try to make it short ..
i am adopted[by far related family] i have 2 sisters but i don't know them ,i never grew up with them and i only seen them a few times.However i was a late child , i'm 19 and my 2 sisters are around 27-29yrs..My oldest sister sometimes visits me but the other one , i barely know anything at all abt her.My [real]parents were very carefree [hence the reason I'm adopted]and i don't even think they deserve to have children,especially my mom , she never took the time to love and be w/ her daughters. I live in America [so does my real parents but we wotn get along]my 2 sisters live in Guyana...and now that im 19 , reality is hitting me that i have 3 nephews .
My biggest worry is that im scared my nephews think that im a bad aunt.I know what its like not to have your really family there and i don't want them to think that i forgot about them. A huge part of me feels like im too young to actually take on the "aunt" role".
Sure i can just get closer to my sisters but the thing is where they live , they cant afford much as we have it here in America so my mom sends whatever to my sisters and though i know they would not agree with her they will just tell her what she wants to hear to get stuff .I went to visit guyana last yr for a funeral and i saw my oldest sister and she cursed me out ,saying that it think im so much better than her, she is jealous of me b/c i have the life she always wanted and b/c ima adopted with better parents and i live in America but she didnt know the h**l i go tru with family of sexual abuse and living life ,i work for everything i own.If yur still reading , i appreciate it =]
I dont want to get close to my sisters right now b/c my [real]mom kicked me out of her house and she would bribe my sisters for info about my life and i dont want her to know anything [ i live w/ my aunts]My mother is a very selfish and cruel woman,she creats allot of problems btw family,she promised to pay for my school if i leave my adoptive parents and live with her but she lied. ..my nephews are abt 8-13 yrs old .I want to be part of their lives.I think me and my oldest sister have allot in common b/c i seen her ways and i know we have allot in common , we look so much alike too .. but she thinks im a horrible person , i think my mom put those taught into her head and she still think of me as a little child b/c thats all she saw from what she knew of me .
Its hard b/c of the distance and i really dont know what to do abt the situation ..theres allot of family drama and im scared to get entangled with it ..should i jus wait a few yrs for things to settle down , meanwhile i finish college then i can have a stable job and actually support and build a relationship with my nephews???
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