HIV: How at risk am I?

Question

I am female, and a few weeks ago had unsafe s*x with my girlfriend for the first time. She performed oral s*x on me (mouth and fingers), and I fingered her very briefly - only briefly, because she has a bad body image and doesn't really like to be touched.

My girlfriend has had one male partner in the past, and I have no info on him. Her HIV status is unknown (she may have it, but she may not). Now, a few weeks later, I'm sick - and I know the first stage of HIV is the acute HIV infection, which usually looks like influenza or mono. My sickness:

- Friday evening: I could feel my throat beginning to get a little bit sore.

- Saturday: Sore throat, slightly congested, low-grade fever (37.5C), head felt foggy

- Sunday: Sore throat (but better than Saturday), congested, low-grade fever (37.5C) which disappeared in the evening, head felt foggy

- Monday: Throat was fine except when swallowing something large, congested, no fever, slight cough, head was clear

- Tuesday (today): cough (due to tickle in the back of my throat), sore throat from coughing (it felt fine when I first got up, but hurt more the more I coughed), congested when sitting still, but mostly fine when standing or moving around, head was clear

I have no sores or rashes anywhere on my body, as far as I can tell.

This sickness came also came on after a week of me not taking care of myself - I was barely sleeping (2-5 hours a night), eating a lot of junk (whereas I usually eat very healthily), and not exercising at all (when I usually go to the gym 4+ times a week). Other people I know have gotten sick in the past week or two, as well, so it's possible it's just a bug that's going around, however I do not know what their sickness consists of.

I've already called and made an appointment to get tested for HIV, however the earliest appointment I could get was not until September 18th.

I don't plan on sleeping with her again until this is resolved, and she herself has been tested (whether I have it or not). I do not do drugs, I have engaged in any other risky behavior. She is the first person I have ever slept with. In short, what I'm trying to say is that none of my other behaviors put me at risk for HIV.

I'm kind of panicking, because I don't know a lot about this, but I'm hoping that there's only a very small chance that I have HIV.

How at risk am I?

Answer 1

HIV/AIDs doesn't show up as quickly as you mention.  Also it must be transmitted by an exchange of bodily fluids (e.g. s***n, saliva, blood).  It sounds more like you have strep throat or mono.

Answer 2

I would say that your risk is slim - but get an HIV test anyway and ALWAYS practice safe s*x in the future

Answer 3

Your risk for HIV is very, very low. Same s*x relationships for women are usually very safe. I work in a STD clinic and we tell people if you don't have a condom oral s*x is risk reduction. In fact I would say you were at a greater risk for a STD rather than HIV.

With that having been said. I would strongly encourage you to get a HIV test no matter what. If this is a relationship that you want to work on, I would even suggest you get tested together.

You might want to try an AIDS service organization in your that does HIV testing, most of them have walk in an no appointment is necessary. You need to be aware of the window period for HIV which is 3 months. We are always telling people that test for HIV about the window period. HIV will usually show up 90% of the time at the end of 30 days, 94-96% after 60 days and 99.6% after 90 days. There is a .04% chance of error.

Again I would encourage you and your partner to test. Peace of mind is a good thing.

Answer 4

you are at an extremely low risk.  really i don't worry about it, i am sure your girlfriend had no open wounds in her mouth as i am sure you would have realized that.  as the second person said, there are no documented case of female to female transmission through oral s*x.  

Not to say you shouldn't be cautious, you don't want to be the first.  

What no one has told you though is that you need to wait 3 months to get the test performed.  the HIV test looks for antibodies to HIV and not HIV itself.  it takes your body a while to build up enough antibodies to be detected by the test.    

Answer 5

When ever you are engaging is sexual activities, oral or penetration without protection you are being put at risk.

You need to remember that all it takes is one person to infect you or for you to infect someone. And when you engage in s*x with someone, you are having s*x with who they had s*x with, and who they had s*x with, and who they had s*x with... basically a large tree of people. None of which you know history about.

Most people who have HIV are not aware of it.

So yes, you are at risk because you had unprotected s*x.

You may be able to get into Planned Parenthood earlier than your September appointment. Ask lots of questions while there and how to best protect yourself.

Answer 6

More than likely it is just a bug.(not getting enough sleep,stress and eating improperly wears down the immune system)

For future reference, don't sleep with anyone in which you do not know their HIV status! but you probably already know that.

Have you personally asked her her status or if she has even gotten tested? it runs the same risk if she sleep with men in her past as well.Or if she had a "drunken night" to where she cannot remember who she sleep with or if she sleep with anybody.

Unlikely but possible.

Just talk with her about it and don't miss your appointment.

Get some rest,eat better and don't stress out!

Good luck.

(ps even though there have been no documented transmission of female to female contact,doesn't mean anything.There could be people out there that either don't know they have it or thought they got it from some dude.It is VERY possible to get HIV from a female not to mention all the other possible STDs.I know of who lesbians who got it female-to-female...one got it from the other who got it from her ex g/f who got it from her ex b/f who got it from his current g/f lol...nasty if you think about it eh?)

just sayin.

Answer 7

As a professional you do not have HIV.  You have symptoms of a virus such as strep or the flu.  It is always best to be tested like you say you are.  If you have no cuts in your tongue and she is clean without sores the chances with oral s*x with another female getting HIV is slim to none.  See you doc for a CBC (basic blood work).  This can tell you if you have an infection.  I'm thinking all you need is an antibiotic.  

Answer 8

You are at VERY low risk... according to the CDC, there are no documented cases of female-to-female transmission of HIV.

That's not to say there is NO way you have it, but odds are very good that you do not.

Also, the symptoms of HIV are FLU-like. What you described there was not flu-like. They are cold-like.

I do think your thoughts of not being active with her again until she gets tested is wise. But I would not lose any sleep over this. Just get yourself checked and be sure for some peace of mind. But don't sweat it.