Question:

HOW DO I PUT MY HUSBAND IN A NURSING HOME SINCE HAVING A STROKE. HE HAS NO INCOME OR INSURANCE.?

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He has become very abusive since his stroke and my nerves cannot take much more. If I could put him in a facility until he has become more co-operative it would be easier to deal with.

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  1. I'm sorry to hear its so hard. I can relate.My mother had 5 strokes at once

    Luckily she didn't become abusive.She became very withdrawn and basically gave up on life.She had a total of 8 strokes in 5yrs.A couple of times I did manage to get her to talk openly with me early on..She said that it was very hard to loose her independence,self worth,freedom.She lived with my oldest brother.Then me(we alternated).She had to have a day nurse come in,as we worked and couldn't handle everything ourselves(her daily care and mom-sitter).

      Having stokes is very difficult to deal with,especially with a combative one.You don't say if its mental or physical abuse or both.If its as bad as seems you should seek help with his PCP before attempting to place him.Do you have children who can help?Relatives near by?

    On my moms first stroke we hired a local teen to come in and help with my mom.She work through the summer till we got hooked up with

    a visiting nurse and CNA(certified nurses aid)We had to get her insurance through the county(she didn't have any before and met the guide lines)Then we signed her up for SS.Between them we managed to keep mom home longer.(our decision)When it got to be to much for her home care we  started looking for a nursing home.Just make sure you check the place out thoroughly before placement.(if they take people for a respite for the caretakers)

    I suggest you start with your County welfare office for insurance,and PCP,neighborhood senior office first.Then if they don't help.Try your local county mental health board.Believe it or not, they might be able to help him and you go through these difficult times

    Hope I was able to help a little : )

    Good Luck


  2. oh man...how old is he?  does he have any say so?  imagine how you would feel if your life suddenly changed for the worse..and I thought marraige was for better or for worse....you should take him to some counseling...and some rehab...good luck.

  3. Just remember that marriage is for better or for worse.  You stated that he has no income or insurance, what about you?  Do you have income or insurance?  If you do, you should place him on your policy.  You should check w/ your state as well to see if he can qualify for disability and medicaid which is governed by the state for low-income people, state and federal insurance cover skilled nursing facilities. Since you're his wife, your status will also determine his qualification in means to income and capability.

  4. If he had a stroke, he should be medicare eligible soon... When did he last work?

    Is he eligible for medicaid? Call the local social security administration office in your area. They can give you direction about state & community resources that may be available.  

  5. Well, you're MARRIED to him, so it's going to depend on YOUR income, also.

    You can apply for Medicaid, or Medicare if he's over 65 or otherwise qualifies.  

    Obviously, either he has to consent to it, or you have to have him declare incompetant.  Being obnoxious is NOT the same thing as being incompetant.  Good luck.

  6. SUMMER OF 68, Home insurance covers lots of different things. I don't understand all the fine print of my homeowners policy, but my home insurance agent is always a phone call away. Try visting your agent or a agent in your town. http://www.usinsuranceadvisor.com/Home-I... They should be able to help you.

  7. Sound like he's already having some emotional and psychological issues, which can be normal after a traumatic experience. Putting him in a home may make him feel further alienated and I would imagine this wouldn't help matters.

    Have you considered spending the money on a nurse to come help you to alleviate some of the pressure, instead of spending it on a home?

    Remember, do on-to others...When you got married the question was "for better or for worse". But if the abuse you speak of is severe and physical and deserves immediate intervention, perhaps a home is not the solution either.

    Best of luck



  8. Try to possess as much information as you can maybe is one option,however it is time consuming,here is the one i have ever had good experience with.http://insurance.free-onlinetip.info/ins...


  9. Sorry to hear of your troubles, I had to put my mom in a nursing home for her Alzheimer's. there are a lot of good suggestions in the answers, but first of all, you will need a doctors recommendation that your husband does need to be in a nursing home in order to qualify for any type of state aid.  You will also need Power of Attorney or have him declared incompetent to make decisions as you will have to make decisions for him.  Also, being abusive can mean there is brain damage and your husband is incompetent despite what others have said.  You will also need to call nursing homes and see what type of clients they take.  Some will not take stroke victims, just physical injuries and so on.  There is a lot to do, good luck to you, you may want to seek some type of contact with a support group.  This situation has already taken an emotional toll and you will need all the support you can find.  

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