HOW DO YOU TELL YOUR SPOUSE HE IS NOT PLEASING YOU IN THE BEDROOM, W/O BRUISING HIS EGO?

Question

HOW DO YOU TELL YOUR SPOUSE HE IS NOT PLEASING YOU IN THE BEDROOM, W/O BRUISING HIS EGO?

Answer 1

You don't tell him that you give him instruction on how to please you!

For example give him direction like this: "WOW that is good but it would be even better if you did .........!"  or "I have always wondered what ............ feels like, please do it to me"  or the ever popular yelling out of directions  "HARDER, FASTER, SLOWER, DON'T STOP"

Then again you can always climb on top and get the ride you need too!  LOVE the "cowgirl" or "reverse cowgirl" position!  

Answer 2

well if you are married him why didnt you tell him when you first got together. at the start of our relationship i just said i really like it when you do... etc and that was it. once he learnt i always orgasmed.

Answer 3

Impossible

Answer 4

Instead of telling him what he is not doing, just give some new ideas that you could be doing.  That way you both win, even if you have to dust off the old kama sutra book that you got as a joke.

Answer 5

Think of ways that would please you and suggest them as like maybe something to spice up the Bed time.  

Answer 6

not possible!  tell him you want to try different things but never tell him he's not pleasing you (might as well give him a gun to shoot himself)  

Answer 7

don't tell him that he isn't pleasing you outwardly.. maybe show him some other things that you want to try,that way,his feelings won't be hurt...  

Answer 8

Guide him with your reactions. "Put" him where you want him and let him know when he finds something good.

Answer 9

dont tell him that hes not pleasing you!

tell him something like "you know what would be really good? is if you did it like this..or if you do this.." you can teach him what you want, its not rocket science

Answer 10

Don't do it while you're in bed. Do it over breakfast or something. Don't phrase it as criticism as much as introducing new things. Use lots of positive feedback (compliments when you like something) rather than negative feedback (criticism when you don't like something). You can try tricks to introduce new things, like play the game that you do to him what you'd like him to do to you (like touch him in a place you want to be touched, and in a way you want to be touched), then he repeats it on you then does to you what he wants done to him. etc.

Answer 11

i dont know what to tell you hunnie

im having the same problem...

:(

but good luck

Answer 12

I agree with Wen Wen. Instead of talking about it, learn how to communicate better with your sweetheart in sign language.  Of course you may not wish to communicate this way too much too soon lest you end up needing one of them special gloves for carpul tunnel syndrome or something.

Answer 13

Get creative, be hornier, speak your desires, and stop faking that you are satisfied. What more would a man want more than a woman who likes lots of s*x to get there? Tell him that you want and need more, he will understand and be happy. Good luck

Answer 14

you tell him truthfully but tactfully but no do not resort to cheating. just tell him  

Answer 15

Just say: "Let's try something new tonight." and then show him how you like it.  

Answer 16

I had the oppisite problem, I knew my wife was capable of a lot more enjoyment than she was getting, I knew how to give her the enjoyment but she didn't seem interested in letting me,  Durring love making, she would just lay down, let me do my thing, and wanna get dressed again, There was no play, and she didn't want me to even try.

If you have a guy who enjoy's plaing, and he's just not doing the job he could, He would probally have no objections to having you say, HEY BIG BOY, Do you wanna try This OR THAT.

What guy in his right mind is going to pass up that offer.

Answer 17

You don't.  Never tell your spouse what he is not doing.  Always tell him what you want him to do.  The first is a complaint, the second is a solution.  Everybody would rather be given solutions than complaints!

Answer 18

I know I am not pleasing my wife at the moment because she is prego...But I plan on making it much better after baby comes...I know what she likes...I know how to set her off. I also know to some extent she's tolerating me...Is certainly a balancing act. Take Care

Answer 19

The male ego is easily bruised, so put the "blame" on yourself.  Tell him that because you're female you have more difficulty in getting aroused and acheiving o****m.  Physically show him where your "hotspots" are, and how you like to be touched and treated in bed....when he does be sure to shower him with compliments, telling him how good he is at it, and that he seems to be a real "natural".  This is a bit of a dishonest approach, but no one wants to hurt anyone when it comes to s*x.....it can knock their self esteem down terribly.  Much luck! :)