Has anyone ended contact with their family?

Question

I'm studying abroad next year and finally leaving the house, I know people may think im just a rebellious teenager but ive never like my family and it's akward even being in the same room as some of them. Have any of you stopped talking to your families all together, and do you regret this decision?

Answer 1

hey i understand what u mean when u say tt, it has nothing to do with being rebellious. personally, im waiting to move out when i turn 23 and get my first job after i graduate as im going to college soon. i plan to rent a house somewhere with my mum. i cant stand living with my dad. hes unreasonable at times, hits my mum and threatens me and says nasty things once in awhile. though i know we're family and have to tolerate each other sometimes, this is way too much. i need a peace of mind and less control and rules in my life.

and when i move out, i might talk once in awhile, but i imagine i'd be much too bz to keep in contact much. til then its good riddance and im waiting for it. cause, come on, if a family cant provide emotional and financial security, then having a family is really nothing, im old enough to survive on my own and fend for myself.

cause we'd all have our own lives at some point in time, we all grow old, get married etc. we cant be with our biological families our whole lives, so there. i tink alot of ppl feel the way u do, so no worries (:

Answer 2

i try but at times it seems i cant

i could, but i would some how feel guilty

and then other people are always asking how old are your parents? brother sisters? whered you grow up?!

so... its not as easy as it sounds

denying family is sort of taboo you are looked at very strangely to say that you dont have family, lie, or disown them.

i feel the same way. I wonder why i have the family i have  

Answer 3

My family is pretty messed up.  So much so that we can't have family gatherings.  But I will hang out once in while with one of my siblings.  No matter how toxic they are, however, I could never stop talking to them, even if it's just by phone.

Time will tell after you leave home whether or not you want to speak to your family again.  It could be that you just need a little independence to be your own person.

Your family will always be a part of you if you talk to them or not.  They are even more important if you meet someone and want to start a family of your own.  At this point in your life, I think it is uneccessary to make any drastic decisions about your family.  Just focus on you and your studies for now.

I'm hoping that your family does love you no matter what they say or do.

Answer 4

Yes, for about 20 years then my Mom died & they all came to the funeral. So I talked to them & all & they still treat me like a kid , I 'm 39, but I guess to them I will always be a kid I even felt like a kid. But I probably won't re-establish contact if they call I will talk to them otherwise I won't. They treated me like the black sheep so this black sheep don't want to get any spots on her. I would rather just remain the black sheep. I do still love them but I feel like they haven't  given a da** about me in 20 years why bother pretending they do now. They all think they are better than me at least thats what I think & I don't have to associate myself with people who think they are better than me if I don't want to. I do miss them but not enough to go see them or even call them. I don't know if this is helpful or not but it is the truth. So basically I haven't talked to or had anything to do with my extended family since I was 19, only occasionally my dad, & constantly my son who I had at 18 & raised alone & my Mom cause I had to take care of her.You have to do what you have to do, its all up to you, if you decide you want to talk to them later you always can.

Answer 5

I haven't spoken with any of my crazy family in six years and my only regret is that I didn't do it sooner. I am so much happier. Life is too short to be around people that don't respect you.

Answer 6

The truth is some families are not nice, some are very toxic.  Sometimes it's better not to have that in your life.  People with generally good families don't understand this.  Maybe you can stop talking to the worst culprits, but keep communication open for some.  In the end, NO ONE will love you like family.

Answer 7

Life is too short, you can keep contact without having to talk to them all the time. Not talking to them will only bring drama in to the situation. Just do your thing and call to say hi every now and then.  

Answer 8

wow! I cut off ties with my family 13 months ago.

my uncle tried to be my father and he screwed me and my family out of at least $150,000. my mom turned on me and took his side. It is safer for everyone because I have an extremely bad temper with thieves and liars.  but thats me. I DONT REGRET ANY OF IT.

what have you done that makes you feel like you dont belong?

thats the question.

Answer 9

I felt that way many times, but thank god I never did it.  Because as much as I cant stand being in the same room as them, they were there for me many times when no else was.Theres nothing wrong with starting a second family of friends.  I did that, now I have two families, one by blood, and one by choice.

Answer 10

While my parents and I are very close, we cut off ties to everyone else on my dad's side of the family. My grandfather lived on the same property as us but in a different house because my dad and him were very close. Some things happened with the family that we found unforgivable, so we cut off ties. We moved away and now have no contact with them. Despite the once very close relationships, we don't regret it at all. We are as happy as ever.

I think that family is family and unless there is real reason you shouldn't, you should still keep in contact. As you grow up, your feelings could change and you don't want to burn a bridge.

Answer 11

Not ended, just avoided. You will think of them and you will miss them and you know for sure some day you will want to be reunited with them.

So don't say you have never liked them because they are yours and you are theirs for keeps.

Have a great time abroad and study and earn something so they can be proud too.  

Answer 12

You can do anything you like,but you may regret if you ended contact with your family or lost contact with your family, friends and siblings are different, you can't change the world, but you can change yourself if you really try.

Answer 13

Hi...

i severed my relationship with my father about 20 years ago. it was an unhealthy relationship, and he abused me in every way you can think of as i was growing up.

since my mother died, i've discovered i never knew either of my sisters... i don't talk with them either.  and it's not hurt me a bit.. in fact, i've grown.

take care

Answer 14

My dad actually stopped talking to his family because they did not like my mom and you know, this was the best decision that could have been made. They treated my mom like c**p, they just wanted to separate them. For an example, two days before my parent's wedding date, my dad's sister got my mom's wedding dress and cut it into pieces. It got to a point where my dad had to pick between my mother and his family, and he chose my mom... so we all don't have contact with my dads fam. of course, my dad still respects his fam, by calling his parents on their bday or on mother s day but from there it does not cross.

I really don't know your case, but if they don't respect you at all, and you have tried to get them to understand to respect you, it is best that you leave them

But if it only causing them problems because of things you KNOW are wrong,, then you should try changing up a bit

Answer 15

I HAVE!!!! no i don't regret it..... i moved out of my house when i was 15 and don't talk to ne of them and people who say "blood is thicker" well thats total BS if blood was thicker my family wouldn't be a bunch of A**HOLES!!!!!!

Answer 16

My relationships with my family members have always been strained and so are their relationships with each other. I have cut off nearly all contact with my mother and I regret that very much. She was not the ideal mother while I was growing up and I ended up cutting her out of my life completely at only 15 when I moved in with my father. My mother has issues with substance abuse which has made having a relationship with her very difficult but I wish I had not cut her out completely for so many years. But, on the other hand I feel I saved myself alot of trouble by not having to deal with her issues. Sometimes I do wish I had made more of an effort.

Answer 17

Ironically, I studied abroad in Australia for a year thinking that would help me sever all ties with my family.  Well, it didn't in fact....I actually missed their odd ways.  When I got back home, I realized that even though family is annoying, they are still family so it's better than being totally alone.

The friends that I have who have little or NO contact with their family are lonely A LOT! They also say that without keeping in contact with their family they regret losing that feeling of belonging. I guess, that's what you might miss while studying abroad-a sense that you belong.  But, you'll see that studying abroad is the best decision you'll ever make, it might even help you appreciate your family. Don't worry about leaving your family simply to escape. Just concentrate on growing personally while you're away, not showing them (family) that you can live with out them.  Just have fun.  Don't stress about family stuff, they'll miss you once you're away and at things will get better.

Answer 18

My 30 year old step daughter is a many faced coniving bi-t-ch. She is one of those girls who is extremely attractive, knows it and cannot keep relationships (particularly with females). She lies, undependable and you never know where you stand with her.

My wife and I broke off contact with her (as well cut her out of the will) three years ago.

I have never regretted this and my wife and I are much happier with her out of our lives.  Her sister has done the same thing to her and she is much happier.

Sometimes that's the only answer when all other avenues have failed.

Answer 19

Yes- I have stopped talking to my father,

a brother, some in-laws, and a child-

with very good reasons for doing so.

They were not decisions made in haste,

and were made only after careful thought

and much consideration.

No- I have no regrets.

I see no point in associating with

people who are negative and bring

unhappiness into your life

every time you come in contact

with them.

My life is much happier without

their negativity-

and no, I don't miss them.

Answer 20

I STOPPED TALKIN TO MY FAMILY WHEN I GOT MARRIED THIS YEAR BECAUSE THEY ALWAYS SLAVED ME AND TREATED ME WRONG NOW WHEN THEY CALL I DONT ANSWER CUZ THEY NORMALLY WANTIN MONEY OR A PLACE TO STAY CUZ THEY GETTIN DIVORCED AND NOT LIVIN TOGETHER I THINK IT SHOULD BE HOW YOU FEEL AND IF YOU WANT TO LOOSE CONTACT WITH THEM I THINK ITS NOT A GOOD IDEA UNLESS NEEDED FOR PRIVACY AND SAFETY BECAUSE DOWN THE ROAD YOU WILL NEED YOUR PARENTS AND YOU WILL NEED HELP AND YOU CAN ALWAYS GO TO THEM.

Answer 21

The last time my mom got married i decided that it was best for me and my family to stay away from her. I haven't talked to her in 3 years now and it really doesn't bother me either way. It dose kind of suck that my kids don't have a grandmother but hey to each their own.  

Answer 22

yeah ive done it. I ve got a p**s poor dad that well is just stupid! I dont regret it, at times i wonder how he is if he still cares but I wouldnt think about ever contacting him in my future there are just those ppl who you could happily live you life without. BUT i dont think you should cut off all contact with your familt no matter ho much you just dont like them its not worth it. no matter how much you're sure you dont need the they'll always b there 4 u. (AT least id hope so)lol but just rlly think if you need them theyre there...4 you no matter how awkward it is 2 b with them, they dont know thats hoe you feel, just dont do it and regret it, cuz in the end it makes you look like the fool.

Answer 23

don't ever even think about alienating ur parents and never ever ever forget what they did for you when you were little. rest you can treat accordingly but if you can learn to forgive and mend things with your family then thats the beest thing to do.

Answer 24

Well when I move out I plan to never talk to my family again, they treat me horribly.

Answer 25

I think you should just call once in awhile, on major holidays / birthdays to say hi. You don't have to talk to them all the time. My sister e-mails my dad every couple of weeks, and she does fairly well with it.

Answer 26

don't do it for some reason in life if you are not cool with your own family other things in your life don't work out (integrity) it's so normal to not like your family when spending so much time together when I lived with my mom it was war.  And once I moved out it was awesome.  But I do call her weekly at least she doesn't call me but at least it's not on my shoulder, just call her every few wk.'s at least ask her how she is doing, and that you are doing fabulous.  

Answer 27

Yes I have went years not talking to my family, due to some real crazy stunts that were pulled on me.  Gun in the face.  It totaly changed my feelings and way of thinking about this person.  But she is  my mother and I finally decided to put the past behind me.  I still don't have the normal relationship that most does but we can be around each other on holidays ect. I did feel quilty for not being around for such along time but they are getting up there in years and we all make stupid mistakes. They would embarase me when we would be out.  But you only have 1 family, and we should feel lucky we do. There are alot of kids and people that have no one that care for them. God put us together for a reason, to give us a lesson in patience or caring or put us through a test, which I sure went through.  It builds charater. So even though I really don't like mine sometimes they are still my family.  I love them but yes sometimes I don't like them. We are all individuals and thats why we have conflicts. Don't totally loose your contact because you could wake up tomorrow and they would be gone.  I feel quilty about that, if I hadnt started talking to them how would I have felt if they would have died. My oldest son is going through this right now. He cut his brother off not talking to him for a year and half. In jan my youngest passed away. Now my oldest is regreting not talking to him, treating him like he didn't exist. It is eating him up inside.  Because he can't make amends now its too late. He finally realized he did truely like and love his brother, but its too late to tell him now.

Answer 28

well it depends on what you have been through with them to answer...If you have very very good reason to end the relationship...then do what makes sense to you...but if you don't then just stay somewhat distant but stay in contact always and do you thing....I wish I knew why you feel this way.....I don't get along with my mom at allllllll but I stay in contact JUST to..and you never know if you need them one day! lol

like something big happens and you have no where to turn to! etc but just keep your distance if anything..  

Answer 29

No actually I haven't tried really truly ending contact with my family but when I was younger I tried it, though. Because sometimes even family members p**s you off badly.

If you find yourself in a same lift with them or something similar if I were you I'd just wave or nod at them to show some kind of recognition. You don't really have to open a conversation or pretend you don't know them. Its not like there's a cold war, is there?