Has anyone ever fostered so they could stay home?

Question

I am a foster mom and that is what I wanna do with my life is it wrong for me to get a couple more kids so I can stay home and raise them

Answer 1

I have not done this myself but, the two siblings I adopted from Foster Care were in a foster home for 8 months and the foster parents told us that this was why they chose to become foster parents.

The husband wanted to open his own business--and the wife wanted to be home with their two children who were early teens... They decided to open their home to as many as 6 more children.

Our children were their first placements. Our son was about 3 months old and our daughter was just over 4 yrs old. Shortly after they were placed 4 more children from two more sibling sets joined the household.

When we transitioned our children from the foster parents we learned that they had fallen in love with the baby and done everything they could to split the siblings and only adopt him... It was very difficult for the foster mother to allow our son to join our family.... It was also VERY hard on me...Talk about feeling like you are ripping a child out of someone's arms....

That's just our story of some of the things that happened to the foster family that chose to do the job in order to enrich their lives financially...  

I think the biggest risk with this approach is falling in love with one or more of the children and having to let that child move on--either by reunification to their biological family which is the Number One Goal--or by transition into an adoptive placement which requires far more qualifications and certifications.

It was also so clear that while in foster care our daughter DID have more issue than were documented. It would have been very helpful if the foster family had been more proactive in finding her services--and getting her issues documented. But, it is also VERY easy to understand how the sepecial needs of one child in a home with 7 other children one of which is an infant---were lost in the caos...

After all the foster mother who wanted to stay home for her children was suddenly driving a huge van full of kids and going to the DHS office all the time for "Visits". Then running around to 8 different doctor, dentist, teacher, therapists, caseworker, CASA's, court hearings....and whatever else was required for any one of 8 kids in the house....

....not to mention showing up for basketball games of her own son with 6 little foster children in tow....everywhere she went....to the stores in town....every fast food joint...and community activities where wild out of control children blend-in....a little.....

so as the Adoptive Mom of a little 4 year old girl who got lost in a house filled with other people's children--over shadowed by a baby brother.... I wish she had matter just a little bit more then the money she provided to people who wanted to stay home for their children......

Answer 2

it is  only wrong if you are doing it for the wrong reasons

Answer 3

Caring for children is a full time job.   I don't see any shame in being their for kids - it beats sticking them in daycare and being a part-time parent any day.

Answer 4

Well, I'm a foster care/adoption social worker and I'd have some serious problems with that on the surface.

Do you want to stay home so you can be a full-time mother to these kids and be available to be active in their schools, therapy, and life?

Or do you think being a foster mom is an easy way to not have to work and get paid for sitting home?

You'd also have to have some other income...the most a foster parent in my state gets is $64 per day...and VERY FEW people get that much...that is for a child, over 14 with the highest need level around (like one step away from being in a residential setting).  Most only get about $16-25 dollars....

That is not enough to pay for your house, food,utilities, gas, car, insurance and the like......You would have to show me that you can afford all of those things on your own WITHOUT foster payment, because the state will not approve you if you can't.

That said, I have a lot of foster moms who stay home full-time, most of them are married, but I do have a few single moms who stay home full-time for the purpose of taking care of their special needs children full-time...but they had some other income coming in (SSI, child support, retirement, settlement)

If your intentions were good and solid, it may be ok.

Answer 5

this sounds fishy to me.  it sounds like you want the kids for the money so you don't have to get a job.

Answer 6

I'd like to know where you live because were I'm from the foster care payments don't even cover the necessities for the kids.

Answer 7

it's an admirable thing to want to foster children, but I didn't think you could make enough money to do it for a living.  as long as you can pay your bills, go for it.  Lord knows, there are too many kids that need a stable enviroment.

Answer 8

If you are doing it for the money, it's wrong.

Answer 9

i think your intentions are good, yet i question your rationale. parents usually foster to provide homes for needy children; not for self-interest.

be well.