Has anyone found that unschooling did NOT work for them?

Question

I've been reading a lot about unschooling. I love the ideas and it seems to be a good fit for my general parenting philosophy and style. But I'm a very analytical person, and I can't help but wonder what the downsides to unschooling are. And they don't really write books about how unschooling doesn't work.

So I though I'd see if I could find anyone here who has had a negative experience with unschooling.

Answer 1

Quick note to Saint in the making: Maybe you get lots of thumbs down because you don't read the questions. This one, for example, asks about UNschooling, not HOMEschooling.

Now, to answer MountainChick's question: I'd like you to consider an analogy. Years ago (before regulations on human testing), a doctor brought some orphans into her home and let them basically eat what they wanted. She theorized that very young children, following their instincts, would eat correctly. And, indeed, that is what she found: the children ate amazingly balanced diets; even when a single meal was out of whack, everything equaled out over time. Of course, she made sure that their choices were good solidly healthy food. No junk food, no empty calories, none of the things that are so common to the unhealthy American diet.

Let's consider unschooling. It can, as the evidence shows, be a wonderful method of learning. The concern parents should have is that, in a modern world with all of its 'junk food' for the mind (TV, video games, stupid internet activities), that kids might not learn to like the healthy things. But I think that if a parent is aware of the risks and watches out for warning signs (e.g. your child is watching 10 hours of TV a day and not doing anything mentally stimulating), the parent can compensate.

Parents just have to remember that, just because it is student-led, their children's education is still *their* responsibility.

Answer 2

I hate it....

It's one of the worst things that has ever happened to me....

Honestly right now? I can't think of any pros, I'm so mad at homeschooling!

But what everyone will tell you is....

Homeschooling is great! You can do work on your own time! You can study for however long you want on your favorite subject! The kid can join clubs! Have alot of friends! And social life!

I however disagree....

I despise it in fact!

I'll probably get all thumbs down, as I usually do on this subject....

I'm just telling you my view though....Some people love it!

I woke up one day....And realized why my life was so lonely, and miserable....

I was naive.....

All my best with your situation!

=)

P.S. Regarding the girl below me....I know what unschooling is....I don't think unschooling, or homeschooling is good....I meant both when I was writing my answer...Sorry I wasn't more specific....

Answer 3

It works very well.

BUT:

The PARENTS have to trust in the process.  Natural learning doesn't look like book learning.  You're likely not going to see your child pick up the algebra textbook and do problems (though he/she might, especially if working toward a goal).

Parents can't get nervous and suddenly make kids do math and reading.  Parents can't cut off the TV and internet and make kids go outside.  The kids must know that their parents aren't going to intervene, that when they're intent on finishing a level of a game that Mom won't snap the TV off and say he's done too much.

Learning takes all forms.  If the kids have been in school, they need to DE-school (about a month per year they were enrolled) just to recover.  During this time you can hang out with them and do cool stuff, but don't promote anything as educational.

Unschooling fails when parents don't trust their children.  Trust is a prerequisite.  I encourage all parents considering it to deschool themselves, and read and find out more about unschooling while the kids veg out.

If a child is engaged with his world, has involved parents, unschooling can't fail.  Kids want to learn everything (until schools crush the fun out of it).

Everything is educational.  You just have to open your eyes to the world of possibilities.

Answer 4

I think it all really depends on what you expect the results to be and how you've raised your children so far. If your kids were public schooled for a long time, jumping right into unschooling and expecting it to work right away might be tough, and for a while it might look like it isn't working out. In this case though I think the kids usually just need time to de-school... get out of the mindset that makes learning have to be forced and unnatural.

If you don't offer your kids creative and educational materials (and this could be tough to do as nearly everything can be used to educate in some way) then unschooling is sure to fail.

If you're not interested in your kids or in their education and development... if you just don't care... unschooling probably won't work.

If you go into it expecting, and even waiting for it to fail... it probably will.

If you discourage creativity, discovery, and exploration... unschooling won't work.

These are really the only situations that I can think of though. I'll be looking back at this question. I actually don't know many other unschoolers, so I'm interested in seeing the answers you get.

Answer 5

I'm going to take a different tack - it all depends on the child.

Some children crave the structure that unschooling can seem to lack.  I understand that it has an inherent structure - one that the child builds - but not all children are comfortable with that.  For some children, a lack of visible structure can be very intimidating or chaotic.  For those children, unschooling may not be a good idea, at least while they are young.

Case in point - a friend of mine unschools her elementary son, and has a daughter following close behind.  Her son thrives on unschooling, but her daughter craves a structured curriculum.  The child can sit and do workbook pages for long periods of time, happily, as long as she has the structure laid out for her.  Therefore, the mom is going to continue to unschool the son, while schooling her daughter using a boxed curriculum that satisfies her interests.

Children are not all the same, and while unschooling works well for many, it's not for everyone.  Heck, not even homeschooling is for everyone.  If you think it might work well for your child(ren), go ahead and try it in doses.  Don't put a huge change on them, but just start putting resources within their grasp that are based on strong interest areas.  Observe from afar and see what they do with those resources.  If they latch on and start poring over them, or start telling you wierd little trivia facts they found out, unschooling might be good for them.  If they completely ignore them or complain about them, it might not be such a great idea right now.

Just my thoughts :-)  These are things that I did with my son.  When he was younger, he really needed the structure; now that he's in middle school, he's enjoying more of an unschooling approach.  He's starting to realize that he can study what he's interested in and still learn what he needs to learn.  Sometimes, especially with an analytical or logic-based child, you need to wait for them to be able to trust themselves.

Hope that helps!

Answer 6

You might take a look at this and see if it gives any additional downsides.

http://www.unschooling.com/blog/?p=64

Personally, if handled right I believe it can be very helpful for some students.  Some children need to be able to pursue their individual interests in order to be motivated to learn.  Using their own pace, their own interests, and time that fits their make up such as: are they a morning person, a night person, etc.