Has anyone heard of the legalities of having to pay child support to a child that is not your own?

Question

I just asked a similar question a few minutes ago. I got a lot of good common sense answers from you guys on it. Unfortunately, sometimes common sense is not good enough in this world. My lawyer here in Ontario Canada, told me that he couldn't protect me from my girlfriend's son, as far as having to pay child support goes. Even if the kid's real father already pays child support, I could still be nailed. Here in Canada, if you have to pay child support, it can extend until the kid is done College and University, or until the kid turns 25 ( I think). Don't get me wrong, I would love to help this boy, but he just wont listen to a thing he is told. He is 14 years old, and I know this is typical behavour of teenagers...but not to this degree. He has been diagnosed with O.D.D. All he does is sit around and play extremely violent video games all day and night. This boy could wind up destroying the relationship with my girlfriend , who is pregnant with my child. I could just tell her to forget about moving in with me and just pay her child support based on my income. I don't really want to do that , becuase I know it will limit my role as a father. I was wondering if maybe I got her to pay me room and board for her son, if that would legally rule out the courts ruling that he was dependant upon me. Just looking for ideas here. This kid is also a chip off the old block...just like his old man! I can sense the kid's resentment of me quite a bit. I am almost sure that this kid and his father would try to cook up some way to nail me if they could.

Answer 1

There are some strange laws out there so I'm not sure. My brother-in-law and his girlfriend had a son together and they found out that they could nail her ex for child support. BTW my brother-in-law AND his ex are both still legally married to their exes. Although they've both ended the relationship with their exes more than five (seven for her and her ex) years ago.

My other brother-in-law raised his daughter's 8month old as his own (he legally adopted her) but 6 years and one biological child later they divorced and now he refuses to pay child support on the adopted daughter. If you don't really think of a child as your own.. don't adopt people. Its not about how evil and vindictive the mother's are it's about making a promise to a child and then treating them differently than their sibling.

The laws are different everywhere. Sometimes it depends on whether or not you've legally adopted him. Sometime it depends on how long you were with her and how long he was a legal dependent. I'd listen to your lawyer or get a 2nd opinion from another lawyer.

On another note... don't blame the child or try to demonize him. Maybe he is a terror but he didn't end up that way purely through genetics. Most of it has to do with how he was raised.

Anyways.. good luck to you either way. Unless there are lawyers on here from your area there is no way of telling the legalities of it.

Answer 2

While you're talking to your lawyer, ask him about a pre-nup that would eliminate you from paying on the kid from the previous guy.

Quite honestly, from what you said, I don't think you have chance if this girl and her son moves in with you. So ... an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Sign a pre-nup that you don't pay for that kid.

Answer 3

Seems to me if this is such a concern for you you should have considered it before you got into a relationship with her and got her pregnant.

Answer 4

I will tell you how you fare on the boy, a few idea's for cohabitation, but first some fact.

   First, a child who has not come into a step relationship by 3yrs or under, will not accept a step "mother/father" figure.

   Step kids are the #1 reason for the high divorce rate of second marriages.

   Are you for real !!!, even considering cohabitation in the same home with an Oppositional defiance disordered step son and a freaking teenager, to boot !!!

   Are we feeling, just a tad, suicidal ???

   As far as support for the "odd" kid, you won't be nailed for it if dad's already supporting him.

    What you need to do, is as you said, pay her child support.

     Should you two cohabitate, you very well could be saddled with the other child, as his father could then go to court and have his cut down or totally removed and he doesn't need to warn you. His ex his taken on the responsibilities of a wife once she cohabitates with another, and so it is seen by the law.

      Further more, living with teens is tough enough, add the fact, he's not going to talk kindly to you, changing things, telling him what to do, taking up his time, attention or anything else with his mother. Even on a good day, it will give him good excuse to pick fights, especially when a baby arrives to add to the chaos. Add the fact that he's Oppisitional and you've lost already

      This is a bad situation all around, i would say no to the cohabitation, best you have a place to return after a few sessions with the odd one, your going to need a hide out.