Has anyone used the Babywise method of scheduling a baby?

Question

Ok, my baby is 10 weeks old and I of course waited until he was several weeks old to realize that the schedule he had in the hospital is gone. If you aren't familiar, Babywise recommends feeding, playing, and then sleeping all in that order. My son wants to feed, play, feed and then sleep.

I have been trying to get him on a schedule for a few weeks now. We were first set back because we breastfeed and I have a fast, strong flow and it would choke and gag him. So, this made the feeding time very difficult and when he would go to sleep I was fine with that. Feeding times also took a lot longer than they should due to the gassiness that we had to get out of him. We have pretty much taken care of this situation.

Now my problem is how do I get him to go to sleep without wanting to eat again? He likes to comfort suck, 99% of the time he is not hungry again yet he just wants to eat. I know he needs to sleep, but I can't figure out how to make him realize that he is tired without putting him in the swing until he is drowsy and then lay him down. Even then I put him down he tries to suck the mattress and makes this huge wet spot where he is laying and then of course he doesn't want to sleep on a wet spot. Yes, he sleeps on his stomach. I know it's not recommended, but on his back he would only sleep for 30 minute stretches and would not allow swaddling.

So, any advice? I have a had a huge time trying to get this schedule thing done, I am trying not to be a milk factory where he can come nurse just whenever he wants like most nursing mothers recommend.

Oh and also what time do you put your baby down to sleep? Do you nurse just before you put them down?

Thanks for any advice!

Answer 1

would you not consider a pacifier? babys have a natural reflex to suck, like you say its not always hunger.

as for the routin of feed, play sleep. if he wont go into that routine, let him find his own - as long as his nights are ok and he isnt confused with day and night and he is awake for a while before bedtime so he does sleep.

my daughter was very difficult at that age, she had a bottle every 2hrs, she was just never satisfied. it wasnt till i weaned her she found her own little routine.

dont worry, it gets better.

Answer 2

Well if you are going to be so hard headed about listening to some unqualified quack of a minister as opposed to the entire medical community who all whole heartily agree that babies should be breastfed on demand, then why not just read the horrid book again?

Sorry, I don't keep my opinions to myself when it comes to that pompous baby bully.

EDIT:   Refering to this specific book will get some pretty heated responses.  Believe it or not, lots of babies have suffered some real ill effects from mothers who rigidly stuck to its principles.  Doctors were seeing a definite connection to it and hospitalizations due to malnourishment and dehydration.  With breastfeeding its crucial to pay attention to hunger cues because the relationship is a delicate balance of supply and demand (key word "demand")

With that being said, theres nothing wrong with using other methods to settle if you are truly in tune with your baby and you know baby just needs comforting not nursing.  Its highly advised not to go by a clock because during growth spurts they nurse more often.

*I* have found that if you have a schedule in your life, the baby will naturally at some point develop a routine that is harmony with yours, but you don't have to be forceful with it, you can put the baby in a sling to nurse or comfort while you go about your schedule.  When you have an older child you have to have a routine for school and such, so it's not unreasonable to expect that the baby will fit right into the family routine at some point (rarely in the first few months).

BUT, implementing EZZO theories is probably just making your life harder and MORE stressful.  Understanding infant biological needs and changing some of your expectations would help.

I would highly reccomend reading a reputable book on infant development and care from a reliable source that hasn't harmed any babies.

I apologize for my harshness, but honestly, his books are some of the most controversial dangerous parenting books of our time.  The fact that near every medical professional would advise you not to read it should say something.

Answer 3

Do not listen to people judging you on your decision to get your baby into a routine. A routine now can make life alot easier down the track. I try to follow a similar routine, and i breastfeed and it works for me.

Maybe look at how long your son is awake for, try to put him down before the second feed. At 8 weeks I found my daughter wanted to be fed 3 hourly, this ment (for us) she woke, had a feed, played for 1 hour, then slept for 1 1/2 to 2 hours.

If your son is awake for longer than 50 mins perhaps you are confussing his tired and hungry cries, its easy at that age. If this is not whats going on then try a dummy.

If this is the decison you have made comitt to it 100% and it will soon fall into place.

My daughters sleep time changes (she is 15 weeks) as she still wakes throughout the night for feeds, and I dont nurse her to sleep.

If you sleep your son on his back wrap him with his arms up so he can suck on them if he wakes up and perhaps he will resettle.

Good luck

Answer 4

"I am trying not to be a milk factory where he can come nurse just whenever he wants like most nursing mothers recommend."

What a sensitive loving mother you sound like.

"Empirical and theoretical evidence combined continues to support current recommendations of the American Academy of Pediatrics that babies, most especially breastfed babies, need to be fed on cue and should be allowed to set their own routine, rather than placed on a predetermined schedule. It is our further conclusion that practices which interfere with babies' cuings have been responsible for low weight gains, failure to thrive, milk supply failure, involuntary early weaning, and possibly even some cases of colic, as well as infant regression and depression due to lack of parental responsiveness to baby's frantic cues."

http://www.llli.org/ba/May99.html

Answer 5

you don't need to babywise your child for them to go to childcare.  

our pretty mainstream pediatrician gives out a newsletter at each visit and it says specifically that the babywise books are dangerous to a child's health.

a breastfeeding baby needs to be fed on demand.

i predict that in 2 months, you will post again wanting to know why your milk mysteriously dried up.

Answer 6

We are also the same schedule of eat, play, sleep, though I do formula feed, but after her 3rd nap of the day, we do eat, play, eat, sleep. If that doesn't make sense, here it is broken into incriments (these are just rough estimates):

8:30: wake up for the day, eat, play, sleep

11:45: eat, play, sleep

3:00: eat, play, sleep

6:00: eat, play, go for walk where she might take a catnap, but no solid block of sleep

9:15: eat, sleep

I am not sure if something similar would help in your situation, but I thought I would put it out there anyway.

I'm not sure how you feel about pacifiers, but if you are not against using them, maybe try it to see if that helps with his sucking reflex and comforts him at the same time. But, I completely understand if you are not open to using a pacifier as many BF moms prefer not to.

Answer 7

I think "obber" is out of line with the adoption agency thing but I do agree with the info she put up.  My daughter took a bottle while falling asleep until she was 5 month old, that's when she was ready to go to sleep without one.  Your son is way to young and he still needs to be feed on demand.  Why would you stomach sleep just so he'll sleep longer?  My daughter would not be swaddled either and I was so sleep deprived the first 4 months I cried all day because I was so tired but it wasn't about me getting sleep, it was about my daughter's safety.  Babies have to get used to sleeping on there backs and now my daughter wants nothing to do with sleeping on her stomach and prefers back/side ( at 7.5 months old )

Answer 8

hi, my baby always had a pretty good routine. it's not something i created for her, but i just followed her own little clock and it worked great! she would always eat, play, sleep, eat, play, sleep, etc.  I did read the babywise book, and came to the conclusion that routines are great (love them!), but i didn't want to stress about creating one. i just tracked my baby's own routine by writing down every time she ate (how much or how long), pooped, slept (and how long), and played. i saw patterns emerge and i just tried to stick to them.  I used this to help track her:

http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Tracker-Round...

i think the most successful way of creating schedules is to follow your baby's cues -- that way you don't have to fight your baby on getting a schedule down. also, i do think breastfed babies are less apt to have regular routines, especially in the beginning.  I bottled fed pumped milk so it was a little easier to get in a schedule as i always knew how much she ate, etc. (this is NOT to say you should do that, nursing is definitely easier!!).  

Sorry i couldn't be more helpful, but goodluck!!  A  nice, predictable routine has really made mothering so easy and pleasurable!  

Answer 9

I've never read the "Baby-wise" book, but I've heard it's garbage.

That being said, I have always been one to use schedules. And my daughter (20mo) has always had a loose schedule that she has followed. However, it's a schedule that she sets, and one that changes all the time. Also, I have NEVER scheduled feedings. I don't know about you, but I don't get hungry at the same time every day, and neither to infants. If he is hungry right before he goes to sleep, then feed that baby, It's crazy to think "well, he really should be playing now...."

Also, why not let him comfort suck? I know that sounds exhausting, but babies usually don't do that for very long. Soon you'll be posting questions asking "how can I keep my 5 month old on the breast for longer than 5 minutes?"

Seriously, this question will be one (I hope) that you will look back on in a couple months and think "what in the world was I trying to do?"