Hate my friend's fiance?

Question

my friend just got engaged. I think he's making a HUGE mistake. his fiance's bossy, demanding, and treats me like c**p. the only reason I put up with it is out of respect 4 him. it's okay if she jumps me, but if I did it, oh no, somehow I'm the one who's in the wrong. basically, look up b!+ch, and you'll see her picture in the dictionary. I didn't call tonight because I knew they were going to dinner so he could propose. (ring in the champagne). but if I called his phone last week, she would answer it and say "I told you not to call James on the weekend!" and then proceed to b!+ch about it. First, it's HIS phone, and not her choice. what if I called and I had an emergency? or a mutual friend was in the hospital? I seriously want to slap her, but have the control not to. now that they're getting married. I hardly get to see him when they were dating, now that they're engaged, i can kiss that good-bye. what should I do about her? BTW... next time she jumps me, i'm thinking about standing up to her, should I?

Answer 1

He loves her and you should respect that. If you feel you have to say something, say something. But don't push. I do agree that it is his phone and not her business.

What do you mean by "she jumps you."?

Just tell your friend how you feel.  

Answer 2

I would just stop calling him and move on.  he is obviously not much of a friend if he allows her to treat his friends like c**p.  If he calls you to go out or anything then you have the option of doing it if you want, but I would say no thanks.  if he asks whats going on I would tell him that you have nothing nice to say about his fiance or the person he has turned into since getting involved with her so you thought it better to move on and let them be rather then confront him and look like the bad guy in this whole situation.  if you say that either he will argue with you and try and defend himself which further goes to show he is being a jerk or he will sit and listen to what you have to say and hopefully take your opinion to heart.  I am married and have been for the last 3 and a half years and I still make time for all my friends and if my friends and my husband dont get along I go out with them on my own and nobody has a problem.   he is letting her call all the shots which is a big mistake.

Answer 3

if and when you get to hang with your bud, suggest watching a movie, Saving Silverman.  Hopefully he will get the hint.  good luck

Answer 4

Wow......I think someones a little bitter.

It's her life. If you don't like it, you should tell her what you think, and let her make her own decisions. If she respects you as a friend, she'll respect your opinion.

Good luck!

Answer 5

You know the old saying, 'Bros be for hoes' Well, that isn't always true. In fact, if your friend proposed to her, than he must feel pretty strongly about her. Chances are, he sees a side to her that you don't see. You must keep in mind that if you do stand up to her, you maybe jeopardizing your friendship with him. I think the smartest thing to do is to talk to him about it. That way he can explain to her that he needs time to just go and hang out with his guy friends. And even though you didn't get much time with him when they were dating, and you most likely won't get much time with him when they are engaged, you most likely will get time with him once they are married, because each of them will start to want their own space. Hope this helped some. Good luck.  

Answer 6

This is the perfect opportunity to learn this lesson.  You do not get involved or say anything negative about your friend's wife/fiance.  Never.  Anything you tell your friend, he will tell her and she will hate you.  Even though she's demanding and has a nasty personality, she means the world to him.  So do yourself a favor and make yourself as neutral as possible for the sake of your friendship.

Your friend has to be the one to stick up for himself and your friendship.  Don't blow up at her.  Just be calm.  The more calm and mature you handle things, the more crazy she'll look.  Don't stoop to her level.  

Answer 7

Yes I would say something to her and in front of your mate but dont raise your voice just keep calm and tell her how it is - she will hate you staying calm.

She has no right to treat you or him in the way she is.

Answer 8

Why don't you start ignoring him and get some new friends. Maybe a little jealousy would open his eyes. If that doesn't work, have you ever considered that maybe it's you. Did you ever do anything to hurt her? Are you trying to be up his butt all the time? If you are trying to take his time away from her, she'll for sure get mad and jealous.

How about you go on a double date together? Maybe that's the only way you'll be able to spend time with him. Maybe the girl will really click with your date. Or maybe he'll see how great your date treats you and have second thoughts about his g/f.  Have you tried sucking up to her? Killing her with kindness usually works. At least in my experience.