Question:

Haunted Sorrow. Just looking for some feedback.?

by Guest59852  |  earlier

0 LIKES UnLike

Just want some feedback on one of my poems. It's one of my favorite three. Be honest. Not fishing for compliments, but things I did right, things I did wrong, how it effected you, and, in general, what you think.

Haunted Sorrow

--------------------------

Haunted sorrow, shattered dreams,

Crying eyes, and a baby screams.

A soldiers tears, lovers mourn.

Love buried, hatred born.

Crushed by rejection, destroyed for fun,

A teen weeps silently, wet drops on his gun.

A single mistake, a million regrets.

A single mother, a new bruise sets.

A hope for tomorrow, fear of today,

Despair for the right, evil gets it's way.

The violence in this world, empty cribs.

A child with memories, a knife in Mum's ribs.

A lovers quarrel destroys, jealousy making a brand new grave.

An officer in the street, watching lives he cannot save.

A siren sounds, a town sighs.

A bomb drops, a country dies.

Save a life, lose ten more.

A tired doctor, Deaths w***e.

A fire downstairs, a family above.

A man on the street, loses his only love.

Soldiers fight to live, politicians payed to dine.

A toast to the bodies, in a mile long line.

Peace only remembered, words known to the aged.

A murderer on the streets, a poor man is caged.

This generation forgot, what a fair world is.

The next, not so lucky, knows nothings amiss.

A reader dreams, hopes for the best.

A poet cries, hopes laid to rest.

Haunted sorrow, shattered dreams.

Life a lost cause, death better than it seems...

 Tags:

   Report

3 ANSWERS


  1. thats... amazing

    :)

    its really sad

    but i love it

    :)


  2. inclusion of word of some happiness will make this poem great

  3. Your poetry is very moving! Doesn't it sound like the world we live in today? Keep writing. I was impressed.

Question Stats

Latest activity: earlier.
This question has 3 answers.

BECOME A GUIDE

Share your knowledge and help people by answering questions.