Have 3 children would love another, hubby doesn't?

Question

I already have 3 beautiful children aged 12, 10 & 5. I would dearly love to have another baby but my husband is adamant that our family is complete. He says we need to concentrate on the children we have and that babies are expensive. I can't get past my maternal instinct to have another child. I am 31 and my hubby is almost 36, he feels he is also too old to have more children. What do you think?

Answer 1

i know its hard you get to that stage when you want one and he doesnt. I have two but my partner told that was enough, im worried as well that i might want another and he wont, its something your going to have to think about. Take a look at the ones you have, are they enough for you focusing on the ones you have got bonding with them.

Answer 2

Hi! Well first, I would make sure your motives for wanting another baby are realistic. Your "maternal instincts" are certainly real, but they may not coincide with reality. Your husband has some very valid points. Babies are expensive. Can you afford it realistically? Also, your other kids are approaching teen years, which will take alot out of you! Maybe you should both seek counseling on this.  But I would say to you to sit down and write out your feelings and your motivations for wanting to have children and then both of you discuss it as a family.  If that doesn't work, family therapy might be a good idea.  Hope this helped.

Answer 3

Ok well i only have on myself and shes only 15mths old but this is a discussion me and my husband have had. He's 31 and im 26 i have PCOS and it took me 3yrs to get pregnant with my daughter so heaven knows how long its going to take for the next one. My husband said he only wants one baby!! I couldnt believe how selfish he was being so i told him i was ignoring wot he was saying and told him i was off the pill whether he liked it or not. Eventually he came round to the idea of having ONE more but he laughs when people ask "how many you want" he tells them well i only want one more but she wants 4 so it'll be 4" i think this is the womans right in every way because i will be the one looking after them!!!! don't see why they dislike it so much when they barely do anything around the house anyway!! Just go for it huni they change when the baby gets here! :p Why should the guy get to call it time on having kids? He gets what he wants you don't...

Answer 4

its good to just focus on your 3 kids

Answer 5

Hmmm, I think you really just have no choice but to do whatever he wants. All you can try to do is convince him but without nagging, letting him see how important it is to you and how much you are longing for another baby. I'm supposing it is sad for every woman when they realise they have had their final child, but it's got to happen to all of us at some stage.

Answer 6

What are some background details? Are you a stay at home mom so you're family is living on one income? Have you talked before about how many kids you both wanted? I definitely don't think that he is too old to have more children so that is a stupid argument but you guys will just have to talk this one out. Good luck to you!

Answer 7

You have 3 already. I'm siding with your husband. He's on strong ground.