Have a crush on him, Can I add him on the facebook?

Question

Hi, folks. That is my stupid story, hope it would not puzzle you.

I have a "crush" on someone, who now lives in a different continent,

far away from my country. He is French and I am Asian. I met him in the french training school one year ago, that guy caught my attention at first,his smile was attractive, OMG...didI fall in love with him at the first sight? In one occasion he came to know about me. but I rejected/escaped from talking to him, even never sayed hello when we faced to faced, but even if I heard about his name, I would be electricified! My feeling is TOO STRONG...

I gave him a gift when I' left his school, which has left me embarrased for a long time untilnow. he did not show anything special towards me. But unfortunately,I am always keep him on my mind, at the same time, I keep telling myself that he is a common guy, nothing unusual, eveven not excellent. in one month of this year, I missed him INTENSELY! recalled all scenes that I met him a year ago....I just searched out his name on the facebook, is it appropriate to add him as contact/friend? Well, it is easier for me to add him on the internet.

But... Isn't it a little bit weird now? should I contact with him

using self-discovered email address? if I get closer to him only on

the internet, would he be attractive as before?

If I did so, What would he think about me? What will happen to me?

One of my friend told me not to try contacting him anymore, otherwise

I will be "in trouble",because I would expect unrealistic things

about him.

Hope you all understand what I am talking about and give me advice

Answer 1

You can add him if you want, but like the previous poster mentioned, this may feed your thoughts even more. Are you prepared for that? And what if you find out he has a girlfriend or has pictures of him with other girls? Can you handle that?

If you can, then go for it. It's okay to add someone you know from school or work or what have you. It's done all the time. But, it doesn't mean that something more will develop. But, it doesn't mean nothing at all will happen. At the very least, you can have a great pal. It's your choice.

In the meantime, try not to obsess over one person - because you don't know if that relationship will develop. Remained open-minded and you will see the great qualities in others, too. And one of those great people will share the same feelings for you back.

I still think about my HS crush at times (I graduated about 6 years ago). But, those thoughts don't overpower me and I have learned to love others since then.

Answer 2

If he lives far away you and chances are you're not going to see him again, don't add him. It's just going to prolong those feelings you have and ultimately cause you pain.

It's hard (and kind of cruel), but the best thing to do is move on. The more time you spend away from someone the less you think about them, which in your case sounds like the best thing to do.