Have i got the right to feel dissapointed...feel my wedding is cursed

Question

i dont have much family like my fiance so my side of the guest list is already half of his which is fine but i hve now found out my faveourite aunt and cousins who live in america cant make the wedding like they said they cold (im in the uk) and my best friend will be traveling round the world. another close friend says she cant make the 1 hour car journey to it. i feel so dissapointed i want to cry. i feel like noone wants to be there on the day and i wont have many ppl to share it with. my fiance says as long as im there and hes there and out mums and dads then hes happy. he doesnt understand how much o a family person i am and now i wont have many people i love there...they will all be his aunts and cousins who i dont even know.

Answer 1

yes you do have the right to feel that way, it is yours and your fellas special day i understand how let down you must feel but sometimes people are selfish and don't think and the main thing is that both of you are there surely that's all that matters

Answer 2

I understand how you feel.  My husbands side of the family is triple or more the size of mine.  I was just thankful for what family of mine did show up.  It was just my dad, my brother, my two sisters, one of my aunts and uncle and one cousin.  My wedding turned out wonderful none the less and was a dream come true.  Focus on the positive and not on the negative.  Your marrying the love of your life, you should be happy whether its just you, him and the person marrying you, or with the guests that do end up being there.  And remember that his family is now your family too.

Cheer up!

Answer 3

Now is a great time to get to know his aunts and cousins so that they can be the family you always wanted too. Don't focus on who won't be there, but who WILL be there, instead. Just like your fiance said, it doesn't matter.  

Answer 4

Keep your chin up... It will be fine.  Your fiance is absolutely right, it doesn't matter who is there!  The fact that your parents can be there is wonderful.  

My husband and I got married at the courthouse because his family would not come (overseas and didn't approve) and my family (all 8 of them) would not come to a ceremony for lots of reasons.  (We are a multicultural/biracial union combining Christian & Buddist beliefs.)

Well, guess what?  I've been the most happily married woman for 21 years and have two absolutely wonderful kids! The actual wedding is just a one day event.  A marriage is what you want - two people hopelessly in love and devoted to one another.  

Answer 5

Yes, you have every right to be dissapointed! Its a big occassion for you that will hopefully only happen once in your life. Can you not re arrange things to a better time for your family?  

Answer 6

No, you have to adjust with the situation to enjoy forthcoming marrital life.

Answer 7

Although we're not getting married until Dec '09, I already know that a few of my close friends who are travelling will not be able to make it & that is very disappointing.  With regards to the guest list, so far my side of the family is more than double what my fiances side is, but we're not worried about it, I think its rare to find a wedding where both sides are exactly equal anyway, I mean everyone ha different size families, etc.  And your fiance is completely right, as long as you are both there & your parents the that is all that matters.  

Answer 8

The way I see it is the most important people will be there.  All it takes is you and him.  And you said the parents and your best friend is there.  The people that you really mean something to make an effort to be there.  It doesn't matter how many people, just how much they love you!

Answer 9

Gosh! how depressing!  

Try to focus on it being a special day for you both & even if no one was there, it would still be special!

As for seating arrangements... dont do the traditional brides side to te left etc.. just get ushers (if u have them) to let people sit where they want...to even things up!

In all honesty, the day will be so busy & hectic, you wouldnt be able to see/talk to/be with your guests anyway.... & thats the war cry of most brides.... all that money spent & you dont get to spend time with guests!

Answer 10

hi i totaly knwo where you are coming from, i am exactly the same and my wedding is saturday, i have aload of aunts who are not coming, friends who cant because of DOGS, (sorry, not an excuse!) and mnay other silly excuses not to come.  

in the end most of the guests are not my partners but ive decided i dont carel, im just gonna have my day and then its done.

dont panic about it to much.  its just silly awful people.  let them get on with it and watch them all come crawling back after.

have a good one

Lisa

Answer 11

oh poor you! i know how you feel, my wedding planing was going fine, all members of both sides of the family could come, the reception was booked and paid for, one week before the wedding there was a huge family row, ( nothing to do with the wedding and not actually involving me or hubby to be ) but unfortunately it stopped certain members of both family's attending, i was like you and upset that the people i loved weren't going to be there. i made the most of it and thoroughly enjoyed the day even without my special friends and family, we didn't get the ushers to sit everyone where we originally wanted them in church and let people sit where they wanted to. the only slight problem was the sit down meal at the reception, so i ran in to speak to the head chef and waiter and explained what we were going to do and got on with it, i took all the name tags off the tables and as the guests started arriving i explained there was a mess up with the seating plan and to just sit where you like ( apart from the top table lol) this worked out great and people i thought may not get on great sat together in the end and had a fantastic time, most importantly hubby and i had a superb day too and i didn't end up stressing to much about it all.