Have to get out the house? Please help!! ?

Question

My marriage has ended after 13yrs. It has been dead a while. My husband put the nail in the coffin when he told me he was seeing someone else.

Thing is we bought a house 8months ago with a big mortgage (we didnt intend to split up).

Now he expects me to live with him while the house is being sold (which, lets face it, could take up to 1yr) I am gutted that my marraige has ended and have nowhere to go. All my freinds have tiny babies and no room.

He refuses to move out; refuses to have the mortgage dropped to interest only, take a lodge and get a 2nd job to remain in the house (He reeeally wants to remain in the house as he says he loves it!)

I have read about companies that will buy your house from you w/in a week. Yes there would be considerable negative euqity. Yes I would have to get 3jobs to make ends meet BUT we would be free of each other.

I have now given him an ultimatum. Eithr we sort something our in 1 month or I am walking. Let the hosue be reposessed.

the atmosphere is terrible. He is constnanlty nasty to me. morning noon and night. I cry about 3 or 4 times a day. Im exchausted! Im not eating.

Please tell me that getting out is the right thing. It is turning nastier and nastier with every passing day!!

Answer 1

Leave now. No one deserves to live like this. Let your husband deal with the house. Good Luck.

Answer 2

Why not leave him and let the court system make him pay for you to live in the house without him.

Answer 3

YES, YES, YES, IT IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO, now lets talk about the problems, you say you have no where to go, so where are you going to go in a month, do you have a job, if you do i suggest you do several things, 1. open a bank account in your name only if you don't already have one, and stash as much money in it as you can, if he has the pin number to any of your personal accounts, change them, and if you can open the new account in a different bank,  2. stop paying the morgage NOW if you don't want anything to do with this white elephant, you need to save money for an appartment or something, and you might be better off filing bankruptcy, 3.DON'T TELL HIM ANY OF THIS, and if you have a joint account you are entitled to 1/2 of all the money in those, 4. do this right away, get all your important papers and photos out of the house, put them in a safety deposit box, take all papers you can, you can always give any back that you have to, 5. if you don't already have one get a job, and if you have to get 2, you don't say if you have any children, but if you do, take them with you, 6. IF THIS GUY IS THE VIOLENT TYPE BE VERY CAREFUL, change all passwords on everything AND WHAT EVER YOU DO DON'T USE YOUR HOME COMPUTER TO DO ANY OF YOUR PRIVATE BUSINESS ON, MORE WIFES AND GIRLFIRENDS HAVE HAD THEIR BANK ACCOUNTS AND OTHER THINGS SCREWED UP OR EMPIED OR WORSE BECAUSE HUBBY HAD A SPY PROGRAM ON THE COMPUTER THAT THEY DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT.    7. one of the most important ones there is, is to get some backbone, and by that i mean, stop your bawling and carrying on like you are, a man thinks that he is making you a wreck and that he thinks that he can do anything he wants cause he feels your crying means you are weak and will do anything to keep him around, so STOP BAWLING AND GET YOUR DUCKS IN A ROW, HE NEEDS TO SEE YOU ARE A STRONG WOMAN AND YOU NEED TO GET A GRIP, i don't mean that it is bad to cry, but it is bad to cry in front of them, or when they might see you afterwards with your red puffy eyes and snotty nose, you need to walk the walk and talk the talk, that you are a strong serious competant woman that refuses to be taken advantage of any longer, and don't forget to have a good cry whenever you can with a friend, in the shower, just as long as he doesn't know about it,

DALE T

Answer 4

let him worry about the friggin house. Do you have someone else you can stay with - maybe a parent, or a sibling (I know you said all your friends have tiny babies), or maybe just rent a hotel room. There are lots of places that would rent out to you for a month at a time - just call around and ask, and then have him reimburse you for half of it.

Answer 5

Yes leave. You could rebuild your credit. Call information and go to a Lady's shelter and tell them you are being verbally abused. Your sanity is worth more then that house. He sounds like he hasn't loved you even way before you bought the house.If he had any feelings he wouldn't be abe to live with the heart break of living with you as well. He probably wants to drive you crazy so he keeps the house to himself. Don't let him win. DO SOMETHING NOW