Have you ever attended a wedding where you truly thought the couple would not last?

Question

And not because you are bitter or don't believe any marriages last lol, but because you actually knew the couple and had concerns about them marrying?

I have never been to one where I thought they would get divorced, but I have been to one where I thought they were going to end up the kind of couple where they are both miserable but neither believes in divorce so they will just stay together despite their unhappiness.

Anyways, If you have been to a wedding like this, how did you deal with it? I just figured I would hope for the best, and celebrate with them and have as much fun and hope as I would for any wedding since I am not a psychic and they might surprise me. What would you have done? Would you still go to a wedding if you didn't think they would last?

Answer 1

The wedding party in my brother's first marriage took bets in the back of church. Three years later I collected from the rest of them! :)

Answer 2

A couple of years ago, some good friends of mine (at the time) got married. He was a lying, cheating dog; and she was too naive to believe me when I told her about his cheating ways (even though his cheating happened at MY apartment, unbeknownst to me). Also, she and his mother began planning their wedding when he left for basic training in the Air Force. He hadn't proposed, hadn't mentioned anything about wanting to get married anytime soon, nothing. A local bridal shop was closing and his mother told the wife "Hey, Special Moments is closing and they're having a clearance! Let's go get you a wedding dress!". THE GIRL WASN'T EVEN ENGAGED!!!!!

I'm honestly not too sure how I made it through the ceremony/reception. I just kind of sat there in a daze. Especially when the preacher began reading the little "essays" each had done before the wedding. The wife's was extremely heartfelt, the husband's was short and to the point and included the words "I know she'll never leave me" in it.

I'm totally convinced that they'll stay together forever simply because the husband wont grow the cojones to admit that he's only leading his wife on to believe they're happy.

Answer 3

yeah, and I was right, too..but I went to the wedding anyway lol.

Answer 4

Of course I would go and I would pray that they will resolve any issues and make their marriage work everyday and then leave it  with God and not think about it anymore.

Answer 5

yea definately, but what can you do?  unless there's abuse or cheating or something going on.. it's really their relationship.  support them and just hope it works out!

Answer 6

Yep.  My old roommate was not the monogamous type.  They made it six months before he filed for divorce.

I know of a few others too,  some just shouldn't get married.  I think it's best to call it off if there are doubts.

Answer 7

Who are you to judge? Are you a close relative to the  couple? even if you are you have no right to be judgmental.

Answer 8

I've been to wedding where I didn't think the couple would last, but as a friend I went to be supportive of their union. It's not my decision to make; it's theirs and their life. Not worth getting involved and creating drama over.

Answer 9

Yes I have attended such a wedding.  I knew that the bride agreed that they would be a childless marriage only to get him to go through with it.  She has no intentions of not having children and as much as said that she would be fixing that "issue" during the honeymoon.  I only hope that he really wasn't that naive to think that she would honor her word.  

We went and supported them and hope that they work it out, however, I do know of a few family members who did not attend because of this.  They couldn't sit still while she did this to him, and because they were convinced that they couldn't keep there mouths shut they chose to stay home.

Answer 10

Yes I have been to this type of wedding but there is really nothing about it that you can do. Just be happy for them and hope you are wrong.

Answer 11

I went to one wedding of a high school friend and was pretty sure they would not last.  They've been married four years so far, but since her and I don't talk much anymore, I'm not sure how their marriage is going.

I just thought they were too young and that they hadn't known each other long enough.  I think almost all the other guests felt the same way including both sets of parents.

I dealt with it by going to the wedding to support my friend even though I didn't agree with what she was doing.  I never told her how I felt and I'm happy I didn't because honestly, who knows if they'll stay together forever or not.

Answer 12

Oh, yes. Many years ago my best friend in high school started dating her boss, who was 22 years older than her. They got engaged before she could legally drink, and although I wished her well I knew they wouldn't make it.  She had "issues" and was looking for a father, and he just was proud to have a young 20-year-old blonde hottie to show off to his friends.  They made it a few years.

And it's interesting you mention the kind of couple that sticks together.  I knew a woman from my church who was sick of the dating scene and met a guy at a Christian singles matchup. They only dated a few times, decided they both had the same values and goals in life, and got married.  But they were soooo different.  They have remained together but she moved her mom in the house with them and she gets all her socializing out of her mom.  Every time I see this woman, which is only a few times a year, she doesn't even know me that well but the conversation always turns into a bunch of complaining about her husband.  They've got 3 kids, and it's the scripted life she wanted - but it's obviously she's miserable.  I can only imagine it's just as miserable to be her husband.

Really, there's nothing you can do. If it's a very close relative like a sibling, you can talk to them about your concerns but otherwise, you just have to let people make their own way in life.

Answer 13

I went to a wedding like that. I wasn't surprised in the least when they divorced a couple of years later.

Answer 14

Yes I have. Most couple just want that Big Show. I have seen many couplesthat I knew would not last

Answer 15

I was at a wedding and I felt liek that because she was a close friend and I knew her long before they met.  Once thye got together she changed.  she was this outgoing bubbly girl who loved attention and affection.  The whole time they dated I never once saw him kiss or hug her in public.  He always told her to quiet down and she just acted different around him.  Things were always her way, not hers or any sort of compromise.

During the planning wedding I didnt say as thing.  Its her marring him, not me.  And I didnt want to push her away, after all  she might need me later if I was right.

And I was, 6 months after the wedding she finally realized how unfair and unaffectionate he was and he wasnt going to chage.  they are now divorced.

She has thanksed me for sticking by her and not telling her otherwise as she thinks it would have caused a problem with us as friends.  And at the time she said even being told she wouldnt have beleived it!

It was her choice to make

Answer 16

Yes.  It was one of those where the couple dated off-and-on for awhile through high school and college.  I think the bride felt that since they were together -- again -- she better tie him down while she had the chance.  They were engaged and married in probably less than a year.  Within a month or two after the wedding, she was already pregnant.  In my opinion, they were too young to get married and too young to have a baby involved too.  I work with the husband and he never talks about his wife -- in a good way -- or the baby.  You'd think a new dad wouldn't be able to stop talking about his new baby!  I just think they were too young.  Too much, too soon, too fast.  :)

Answer 17

I clearly remember thinking during my cousin's wedding that it would not last.

Surprisingly, they stayed together for 25 years before splitting up.

Answer 18

Yes, my brother's marriage. He is totally unhappy, but he sticks with it because of all that catholic c**p he was fed by relatives.  His own problem.   My SIL is a nasty individual with all sorts of control issues. Fortunately, they both live 1,500 miles away.

I also have to say I expected my sister and BIL to divorce, which was one of the reasons I didn't want to be a bridesmaid. He was such a self centered SOB.  Ultimately, family pressure forced me to be a bridesmaid, but the marriage ended before it was 7 years old.  Hard to believe but his mother was even a bigger SOB in death than she was in life and created the final rift.  I have to say though, I enjoyed the wedding itself.  Lovely place, and the reception had great food and some very interesting guests. It's always been a mystery why some of these guests chose to be friends with my ex-bil.