Have you ever felt so alone?

Question

My husband is a good man and a hard worker. However, he has been under so much stress lately because we just got married, have a baby, and are new home owners.

He already works for a great company that gives us very much needed benefits but he is also trying to pursue his life long dream of owning his own company.

Mon-Sat he wakes up at 5 and leaves for work arriving home 12 hours later. I miss him so much and I am so tired taking car of the baby all on my own and I just need his companionship.

Now, as soon as he comes home he heads out again to do handyman jobs.

I dont even get dinner on the table for him till 8 at night and then he goes right back to sleep.

I miss my husband and I'm afraid I'm falling into a depression.

Whenever I try to convince him to stay home for the evening he gets really angry and acts like I don't care about our families finances.

I'm just so alone... what should I say to him?

Answer 1

Explain to him that some things are more important than money.

If he has to work that much to support what you have now, maybe you're living above your means.  It's easy in America to get caught up in "the dream" - big house, car, 3.5 kids, etc.  But would it work for you to live in a smaller house, cut costs wherever possible, and have him around more?  Maybe that would allow you to save some money and invest, which could in turn allow you to move to a bigger house without having to work so much..

Just some thoughts.  I'm sorry you're going through this, it has to be tough.  Good luck sweetie :-)

Answer 2

i'm sorry. this is a tough situation and it doesn't seem fair. He has to do what he has to do and he's not mad or frustrated at you or the baby he's probably under so much pressure to give you and the baby the life he knows you deserve. You need to talk to him about it. Make him understand your loneliness and I'm sure the baby misses him too. Maybe he'll come around and know family is more important than money and you two will get by just fine. And when he is working, invite a friend over or your mom. It'll make the day go by faster and you wont be so utterly alone. good luck and keep your head up.

Answer 3

wow thats tough...all I can say is, let him know how much you love him, sit down and talk to him, tell him you are starved for effection, and though you care about finances you care more about your loving husband, and a loving father for your Kid. as a father and husband he needs to MAKE time for his wife and kid.  Be nice about it, but make sure he knows that things need to change.

Answer 4

I know that your alone and that it is hard and I know how hard it is to talk to someone sometimes but you have got to get your point across to him even if its in consoling. I wonder if he may be scared of staying home. that the pressure of taking care of the baby may make him feel inferior to you cause you do it all the time. sometimes men don't like to be where they feel bad about themselves and he can probaly work very well and so thats what he does. it makes him feel good. men are sometimes like kids they need to be reassured and cuddled. tell him your lonely or play trick games on him. tell him you just can't do something and you need him to do it for you then he'll feel like a big boy again....don't let him know that cause that will aggitate him and don't laugh at him, just love him and be patient...don't get depressed, he may be suffereing from anxiety and depression also but you guys do need to get on the same page.. I don't think love is a problem here.