Have you ever felt that you were born into the wrong family???

Question

Well it just seems that my family just doesnt understand my passion for horses. They finally bought my first horse this year and i love him to death. The thing is, they just arent into the whole horse, ranch, trailer, showing, lesson type of thing. I am 16, so i am not a spoiled brat , i appriciate everything they have done for me.

the thing is i want to go further with my horse, i want to show him, and even get a second horse.

If only we had a ranch :( I would like to take my horse to shows and even begin 4-H, but my parents dont know anything about that either.

Just wondering if any of you out there feel like you werent born into a horse family???

How did you cope with that to achieve your goals with horses???

Answer 1

just wait. you'll be leaving home soon, so you can start your whole ranch thingy yourself.

Answer 2

Flip side.  I was not born into a horse family but my daughter was.  Of course, she wants to play video games.  I WISH I could get her out to ride some of our ponies.  Now if I owned a video game store, she would want a pony.

Answer 3

I know the feeling, I too am the only one in our family who rides horses, i wish i had a horsey family then i could have a horse but oh well

Answer 4

Ahh totally :( I spend 5 hours a day with my horse if not more, and i love him more than anything in the whole world. But my family never gets excited about anything I do with him.

Answer 5

Yes... I know how you feel. I was "bitten" by the horse bug when I was about 7 started collecting horse models. Then took a college class in high school called animal care and management where there was a section on just horses and I re-fell in love! I started taking lessons and will be going to my first show this month!! My dad doesn't get why I like them or the point in learning to ride. In his mind he thinks you get on kick and steer lol. My mom is just starting to realize how much I like horses after a year of riding lessons! I live in the country and have the land plus my own job and money but I don't see my parents letting me keep a horse on the land... I wish I could have been born with horses! Its to bad I am too old for 4H now. Well after college it will happen! I will get my horse someday!!! At least you have one even if it is at a distance!

Answer 6

I know how you feel. When I was your age it was hard to find anybody to ride with and I couldn't get into 4H or gymkhana. It still is. You may just have to make do with what you have now. Make it your goal that when you are on your own that you work toward getting your ranch. If you you want it bad enough, you get it and do whatever it takes. Search out on the internet websites about 4H and show them to your parents. explain what you want to do and what you will do to get there. Not everybody is Horsey, but there are a lot of horse people out there and you should meet some where you keep your horse.

Answer 7

Yes! I felt like that all the time.

Answer 8

Yeap, your not alone.  I too live in a city and am the only horse lover in my entire family.  Even my friends think that riding horses is wierd but I love it and dream of one day living on a ranch or somewhere that would allow me to live with my horses.  I can't even afford a horse because it's way too expensive to have in the closest stables by me.  $900/month and that's just for that stall!  Congrats on getting your own horse though.  That is something that I will always dream of.

Answer 9

I know how you feel my mom is a single mom and adopted I feel awkward with my family. I can't stand them they don't under stand me either or my love of horses. Also I am the first grand daughter in my family but I can't stand it with my 2 4 year old cousins everything is about them no one even cares about me I entered my first show I asked for them to come they said they can't because they half to take care of my cousins they didn't even try to come. I rarely see my family or even talk to them now. Also I hate it because my cousins are devils for four year olds they hit people and bite people already they are the most evil brats if they ask to ride my horse I am going to say no I get so mad. I know how you feel trust me

Answer 10

I was born into this same kind of situation- I didn't get my first horse until I was 15, and even then, I wasn't allowed to do anything with him because my parents refused to subsidize my riding or other horse activities. I wasn't even allowed to join 4-H, because that would have meant a monetary investment which my parents refused to make. I was stuck with riding my horse around our farmette, and taking rides up and down the driveway with our neighbors who had horses. I wasn't even allowed to leave our property until I turned 18- and even then, I could only ride off our land if someone else was with me. The restrictions drove me insane- and they really weren't necessary, but my parents thought otherwise.

I coped by doing as much reading as I could, and practicing what I read in books on my own, and taking whatever lessons I could from anyone I could find in the area. When I started college, both of my horses had to be sold to pay for tuition and other expenses- I went to a private school, and it was too expensive for my family to keep the horses at home with as many as 3 people in college at one time, so they got sold. You may eventually have to face something like this yourself- and it's best that you be prepared now for it. I would take all the lessons you possibly can, and FIND A WAY TO PAY FOR them yourself, and don't rely on your parents all the time. Ditto with showing- you can find lots of ways to earn money on your own to pay entry fees and shipping and stall fees for your horse. Learn to braid manes, sweetie- most braiders make a TON of money, and good jobs will earn nice tips from trainers with lots of money. Be a working student at the barn where you keep your horse, and work in exchange for your lessons and riding time. Most trainers generally welcome working students- and you can get great instruction at a nominal cost that way. In the summer, get yourself a job in the barn, mucking stalls, cleaning tack, grooming horses, tacking horses for lessons, or whatever- and save the money.

Lastly, because you are 16, you need to take Driver's Ed in school and work on getting your license ASAP, so your parents don't have to be the ones who are taking you to and from the barn all the time. That's probably the real objection they have to what you are doing, more than anything else, because it means they have to take time out of their schedules to accomodate you. If you have a license and can drive yourself to the barn, then what you are doing will become less of an issue with them.  Finally, it goes without saying that you MUST KEEP YOUR GRADES UP and do well in school- because if you don't, riding will be the first privilege which will get taken away from you- and it may get taken away permanently, the way it nearly was with me. Take care of yourself and your health too- that means no drinking, no drugs, and NO unprotected s*x. Pregnancy and riding don't mix, sweetie. Keep your head on straight about these things, and you'll be okay.  

Answer 11

no...my whole family is horse crazy. once we had a family reunion and afterwords, the whole family all went together to a tack shop.              I have a 11 year old, 14.3  appaloosa that we've trained, we compete in local shows.

It must b hard to love horses but have a family that doesn't understand!

Answer 12

Im 18 and lets put it this way. Its not that my parents do not care or want me to have a horse but lets start here.

My first word was not mama or dada but horse than bit. I have been riding since I was 2. I stopped because I got good and then my parents would not drive me to lessons and said we have been doing this to long. I didnt ride age 10 - 13. Than I started working at a stable. My parents saw that I really loved horses and helped me show, but didnt read up or ever buy me a horse.

I didnt get my first horse until I was 17 and could afford board, vet bills, and farrier bills.

I am the happist person. I had to wait for what I wanted but now Im 18 and unstopable. I own a TB mare who could not make me any happier and I ride for my college. My parents support me the best way they can, but its just not their passion. They will come  to the barn sometimes with me but still they no nothing about horses.

I just am happy that they took me to ride when I was 2...how cute...I wish I had pictures...i do but yah that was when they didnt have ditigal cameras.

Answer 13

Yes i do. I have a very simular problem as you. I live in a small town in a rural community. I live in town where u cannot keep any horses. I have been taking lessons for 7 years, and now have a lease on and am rodeoing on one of my instructers horses. We are doing very well and have a lot of talent. Only there is one problem, my parents have "no clue". My dad is very prissy and freaks over tiny bits of dirt and etc..., he cannot remember a single thing i tell him about horses or rodeo. He asks really stupid questions all the tim, like the other day he asked me what a bit was and he wasnt joking!!! He doesnt understand the seriousness of the sport and says that i cant go out to ride my horse if i have the slightest bit of attitude when i am  talking to him. But he would never say that my brother cant go to his basketball practice if he did the same thing that i did etc...because he doesnt realize the importance of practice, and about said that i couldnt ride my horse the day beforea rodeo because i was getting frusturated with my goat tie. They take my passion so lightly that it makes me sick. They tell me that if i want to get  horse i have to pay for every single little thing myself which isnt fair because i am only 14. they dont understand it or try to understand it which hurts my feelings really bad.I have even cried myself to sleep over this matter because they dont care or even give a c r a p about it.  

Answer 14

Young lady, you're going to learn someday when you're older that there are reasons for everything.  Trust me - I remember that I knew it all when I was 16 and 18 - I knew how to get rich with horses without my parents help - I shouted and kicked my feet for not getting what I wanted.

Now that I'm 41 years old and have worked a good 25 years, I know the value of want vs. need.

I think you need to focus on what they HAVE given you and make the best of that in preparation for being on your own in a couple years and able to then do what you want.  I suggest you stop bemoaning what you CAN'T have and go after what you CAN have.  That horse you have can teach you an awful lot - do you know everything there is to know about horses?  I doubt it at 16 with your first horse.

Spend this time rather than moaning and go out there to some websites and see what you can learn - check out Ray Hunt's website and see all the questions people ask about their horses.  Go the library or use your allowance ot purchase books and videos to learn all you can about them.  Check out books about how to build barns and sheds and wahtever else you need for a horse.

Then use all that great information to plan what you want and how you'll get it.

Soon you won't have your parents to blame for not getting what you want, you'll be a big girl out on your own with college and/or a job to worry about that will get you a career and allow you enough money to have everything you want.

But first you must learn to manage money, get and keep a job, budget your money so you aren't robbing from peter to pay paul to barely keep a horse as best you can with the little money you can make.

Good luck - I look forward to hearing from you about the great life you make for yourself and your horses someday.

Signed a 41 year old woman with 6 horses and a good job

Answer 15

Totally with you there!

I'd always wanted a horse, but my dad hated them with a passion. (Stepped on by one or some such!) I dealt with it by getting my own, when I was finally old enough and when I finally found the right sweet boy!

Answer 16

I know how you feel i wish i was born living on a farm or ranch or even a few acers with a few horses

my dad isnt much of a horse person and whenever i talk about getting on he acts like i will never get one in my life and stuff like that but i want to prove him wrong(my parents are divorced) my mom is fine with horses she would like to have one and she has ridden before but for some reason she just wont get me one

she gets all excited when i find a good horse for sale and wants to go look at it and stuff and then either says we dont have to money(which we do) or she says that i dont take care of my responsabilities(feeding cats n dogs cleaning room etc.) which i do so i dont get what her problem is but i am goingt o show her that i am responsable so that she will get me a horse =]

And I live in California too by the way and it sucks a$$ I wish I lived in like Benton Arkansas or at lest somewhere in california that had land so i could get a few horses

EDIT: I just read that you live in Scramento. I live about an hour away from there =]

Answer 17

Yep, I am the proverbial black sheep.

My sister had riding lessons for a while ( but I think it was more that she didn't want me getting something that she wasn't.) but gave up after a couple of years.

No amount of begging or pleading would persuade them to buy me a horse even though it was the only thing on my Christmas list ( and Yes they certainly could have afforded it - Dad was a structural engineer)

I got my horse after I had finally found and married someone they didn't approve of, estranged myself, made peace and produced an heir or two.

The horse is mine, Mother has met him once and has still never actually seen me ride.

I am sure I was switched at birth.  

Answer 18

Instead of coming onto Yahoo Answers and complain about what you DON'T have. Why not try and look hard at what you DO have? You have a horse for christ sakes. Your parents didn't have to help you achieve even that! Do you know how many young people are sitting around wanting their own horse and aren't given that much? I wasn't allowed to purchase my first horse until I was 16. I was stuck riding broke down Blossom and Tater Tot my little hunter/jumper and dressage pony's that were my brothers and sisters hand me down horses for a long time before I was ever able to afford my own horse. Yes that's right, my parents didn't help me purchase my first horse. I had to go out and work minimum wage(which was just around $2.50 back then) and do barn work just so I had a place to keep and ride my OTTB.

You want to complain, just suck it up and deal with it. If you aren't able to show with this horse, there is always the next horse. There are some people who don't get into showing until they are in their 40's. Focus on the fact you HAVE a horse and not the fact you aren't getting to show him. Shouldn't that time with your horse be just as important whether you are showing him or not?