Question:

Have you ever had anything like this happen to you?(jokes)?

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Customer: 'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't get

through to enquiries, can you help?'.

Operator: 'Where did you get that number from, sir?'.

Customer: 'It was on the door to the Travel Centre'.

Operator: 'Sir, they are our opening hours'.

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Samsung Electronics

Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'

Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking

about'.

Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states

that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone

Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'

Operator: 'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'.

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RAC Motoring Services

Caller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am

travelling in Australia ?'

Operator: ' Doesn't the product name give you a clue?'

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Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in

France ):

'If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering

wheel to the other side of the car?'

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Directory Enquiries

Caller: 'I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff

please'.

Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?'

Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B'

fell off'.

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Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.

Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'

Caller: 'Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland'.

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On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone

box told a worried operator:

'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the

number on'.

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Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.

Customer: 'OK'.

Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.

Customer: 'No'.

Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'

Customer: 'No'.

Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until

this point?'.

Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click''.

--------------------------------------...

Tech Support: 'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you

see the 'OK' button displayed?'

Customer: 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'

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Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just

realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I

have my file back again?'.

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Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.

Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'

Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'

Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'

Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words

went away.'

Operator: 'Went away?'

Caller: 'They disappeared.'

Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'

Caller: 'Nothing.'

Operator: 'Nothing??'

Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'

Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'

Caller: 'How do I tell?'

Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'

Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'

Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'

Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything

I type.'

Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'

Caller: 'What's a monitor?'

Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.

Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'

Caller: 'I don't know.'

Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where

the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'

Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'

Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's

plugged into the wall.

Caller: 'Yes, it is.'

Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there

were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'

Caller: 'No.'

Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and

find the other cable.'

Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'

Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into

the back of your computer.'

Caller: 'I can't reach.'

Operator: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'

Caller: 'No.'

Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way

over??'

Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's

because it's dark.'

Operator: 'Dark??'

Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is

coming in from the window.

' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'

Caller: 'I can't.'

Operator: 'No? Why not??'

Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'

Operator: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it

licked now.

Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your

computer came in??'

Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'

Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up

just like it was when you got it.

Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'

Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'

Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'

Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??'

Operator: 'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a

computer!!!!!'

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17 ANSWERS


  1. GReaaaaaaaaaaaaaaT very funny


  2. G'morning Hannah =)

    I laughed out loud at this one: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia ?' because it nearly happened to my mum - luckily she paused for thought.

  3. ahahhaahahah that was hilarious in the end hehe and no u crazy? if the operator was so dumb i wud have hunged up when the convo started lol it was funny though but the guy is stupid why didnt he hang up? lol

  4. excellent computer jokes, watch out i might add some too!!!

  5. Loving the last one, sounds like my parents lol!

  6. not yet but im sure it will happen to me one day XD

  7. LOVED THE LAST ONE!!!

  8. hahahahahahahahaha!

    Oh the laughs I had

  9. Yup, my dad is this bad. When he first got his pc, he asked me "how do you tune it in", another time he asked me what a desktop is.

    I get really frustrated with him, because he always writes down notes for the stuff that I show him then phones me later to ask how to do it.

    _

    D

  10. all the time

  11. It just goes to show how some people really are ! theyre good thanx    

  12. ????????????????????????????????????????...

  13. he he he, those were some good ones

  14. lol the samsung one is hilarious!

  15. no! i can't say i have.

  16. have a star.

    great start to my day.

    i loved the last one

  17. ^,^

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