Have you evr given up a child for adoption- thoughts, advice, regrets???

Question

Have you evr given up a child for adoption- thoughts, advice, regrets???

Answer 1

I considered adoption & almost gave in to pressure from my adopted mom to relinquish my daughter after her dad & I divorced - she was a year old.  And I was 18.  I feared that she may be right - perhaps I couldn't be a good mom because I was so young.  Maybe it would be better for my daughter to have different parents. Older parents. Parents with money.  

Thankfully, I listened to my heart instead and kept my daughter. I have NOT REGRETTED that decision once in 30 years since!  It was rough for us for a couple of years, especially because I didn't have any support from or contact with my family.  But we managed. I went back to community college, got a degree and a good job.  

Having her was the best thing that ever happened to me!

Today, my daughter is an amazing young woman. An incredible, loving mom, wife, successful business woman (owns her own business).  She's given me 2 beautiful grandchildren!  I'm so proud of her!

After reading the book, "The Girls Who Went Away", by Ann Fessler and knowing a few women who relinquished, I am beyond grateful that I chose to mother my child.  I don't think I could have survived the pain of relinquishing.

God bless you and best wishes in your journey!

Answer 2

I NEVER WOULD

NO MATTER WHAT MY FINANCIAL STATE WAS

I COULDNT LIVE WITH KNOWING THAT MY KID WAS CALLING SOMEONE ELSE MOMMY

Answer 3

i gave a baby boy up for adoption 7 months ago. I am a 34 year old mother with 2 girls ages 3 & 13. My financial situation would not allow me to provide for anyone else. I thought about getting an abortion but then i thought og how many people in this world long for a child they cant have and my decision was easy.i met and became friends with a couple at the adoption website and over the months i was pregnant ,came to terms with what a blessing it was for all of us. My child went to a family that is well off financially,spiritual and has good morals and values. I have no regrets at all. The parent keep in touch with me and send pictures and emails. I am very blessed and so are they

Answer 4

I haven't but I was given up for adoption. I now have a relationship with my blood Mother if you have questions about how I felt you are welcome to ask xx

Answer 5

yes, i have. and first off let me say that it was harder than i thought it would be, but i don't regret my decision for a second. i know that i made the right decision for the child.

Answer 6

I was forced to give a child up for adoption.. its the hardest thing that anyone can go through... luckly my adoption is private, but an open adoption, so I do have some kind of contact.

Answer 7

As an adoptee and a birthmother I can honestly say that,of course,there would always be regrets to some extent but to be honest I knew that at the time of my daughter's birth there would have been more hardships for her if I had not given her up as I would not have been able to provide everything for her that a family would have been able to.All I can say as advice is that anyone considering adoption,in either form,must carefully wiegh the pros and cons and always put what they think is the best for the child/children in question above all else

Answer 8

I did and I regret it. That was 36 yrs ago, and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't wish I hadn't given her up. Don't let people (parents, agencys, doctors, lawyers) talk you into anything.

Answer 9

I have not, I am sorry.  I just wanted to offer you advice in the form of a book, "the girls who went away". There are alot of quotes from first mothers.  Although the situations are not modern, the emotions and feelings of these first mothers are timeless.  Its a good read too.

You should talk to "Red and Sassy" she's an amazing first mother. "Andraya" rocks as well.  I'll star your question and maybe they'll come around. There are more wonderful first moms that i'm drawing a blank on.  Best wishes to you.