Having a Christian wedding on beach, but Catholic friends that says it won't be valid? Have to stay chaste?

Question

Some say have the marriage blessed by the church after? But why should I stay chaste after my Christian wedding? The Catholic church did not make it easy for me to get married 3 months after I was engaged. We were together for 2 1/2 years before being engaged, could the Catholics be right?

Answer 1

Some Christians don't believe in getting a marriage license because it is permission by the State to get married.

But if you want the legal rights (& protection) offered by this contract, then a marriage license must be purchased.

Clergy are granted legal permission to act in the State's behalf to solemnize marriages.  According to the State it doesn't matter whether you are Catholic, Christian, Humanist, Pagan or Atheist.

So whether your friends think the marriage will be valid is moot.

Answer 2

http://www.bustedhalo.com/features/Catho...

I would direct you here. This contains a lot of information about what is required in order for a marriage to be legal in the eyes of the Catholic Church. You may be married legally in the eyes of the state, but you are not in the Church.

Answer 3

when you are legally married, you are husband and wife- bottom line!! in my opinion, no need to stay 'chaste' from your husband.

however i ABSOLUTELY recommened having your marriage blessed as soon as possible. not for any religious "rules" or superstitions, but because it just makes such a difference to be joined that way for the two of you as a couple.

Answer 4

If you are Catholic, then your friend is right.  The Catholic church only recognizes marriages that are performed in their church.  If you go ahead with the beach wedding and don't get a blessing by the church afterward, you will be considered by the Catholic church as living in sin (I'm assuming you'll be living together after getting married on the beach) and won't be able to take part in communion.

Answer 5

You are confusing a legal wedding with a religious wedding.  Most religious clergy are also certified by the state to legalize weddings, so the Christian Pastor will be a legal marriage officiant (generally).  They are the same as a marriage officiant, judge, justice of the peace, etc.

In some countries, you must go to the registry office to get legally married, - and then have a separate religious service.  In some places, the priest/pastor/imam/rabbi is also able to sign the legal license,   (Some clergy are NOT certified by the state, be sure to ask for their license).

Your legal wedding -- in a church, on a beach, in City Hall, in your apartment, is the one that counts for legal reasons.  The religious one is only a choice, if it matters to you.  

If you WANT a catholic blessing, then go ahead and get one.  The same thing with any other faith.  Some religions recognize all other weddings for religious purposes.  Some (mostly Catholic or Ultra Orthodox Jewish) do NOT recognize weddings by other religions.  If in doubt, find a more liberal clergy person -- and have your marriage blessed.

But once you're legally married -- that's it.  Husband and wife. Everything else (blessing, registering the marriage with the church) is just a personal choice if it matters at all.

Answer 6

Have your preist marry you privately in church before you go to the beach wedding. Then you don't have to stay chaste after your wedding before a blessing.

Marriage 3 months after engagement is not enough time to go through all the preparation, no matter how long you've been together. They treat everybody the same and make every couple go through the same routine. So they weren't making it difficult for you -- they were treating you the same as everybody else.  

Answer 7

ok i am neither christian nor catholic but if you have a legal marriage in the eyes of the state and you both love god or however you want to say that i dont see the point in having an EXTRA church official do it. meaning the catholic one. if you want to go with a churchy type veiw god is everywhere being loved enough to get married before god is enough isnt it? its in the vows... right? the path you choose is the one thats right for you. catholics tend to be a little less accepting that god is everywhere and depend more on the church to do everything for god. but the vows explicitally say you are meeting in front of god and take this woman and this man blah blah blah....

i think it matters more whats in your heart and in your mind. then another being of flesh and bone to bless you. its a bonding of the soul and something that is suppose to be eturnal.

Answer 8

If you aren't Catholic, then it doesn't matter. However, you honestly don't sound like you have specific beliefs of any kind. Just because you have a Christian minister preform a wedding ceremony doesn't make you a Christian. That's like saying walking into a garage makes you a car. It doesn't work like that.

Tons of Christians get married everyday in churches and other places all over the country. And they are just as married as the person who gets married in the Catholic church. They just aren't Catholic. The Catholic church has rules, but if  you aren't Catholic, then don't worry about them.

Answer 9

Regardless of what the church might say its a legal and binding contract no matter where you marry if the officiant has been ordained.

i had a friend have a catholic ceremony on the beach and her priet was there to marry them.  the church recognized that!

Answer 10

Your wedding on the beach was officiated by a pastor, has been witnessed by family members and close friends, and has the same ceremonies as that of a catholic wedding, right?

So in my opinion, there won't be a need for your marriage to be blessed by the church after if you don't want to because you've already been blessed by God when you got married through the pastor whom he has vested His powers upon for you to be united in marriage.

So God bless your marriage and live happily together in the love of God!

Answer 11

Marriage is a beautiful sacrament and is so much more than a legal contract recognized by the state.  Everyone who enters into marriage will want to have the best possible understanding of how in this calling to holiness through marriage they may grow more closer to God, each other and through the blessing of children be able to pass on the catholic faith to them.  In marriage we enter begin a family, sometimes even referred to as the domestic church by which parents are called to bring children up to know of the hope we have in Jesus Christ, be fully formed in the faith to serve God, His Church, and others to the glory of God.  In the sacrament of marriage you are called to so much it is truly a blessing from God.  Congratulations.    

Take the time to talk to your priest learn of your vocation to married life among the many things you will learn, to enable your marriage to be fruitfull, will be the difference between chastity and abstinence.  As you seem to be confusing the two.  Here is a link from the Catechism of the Catholic Church concerning Chastity  http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/__...

and on Marriage http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/__...

Ask your priest as much as you can think of they are very knowledgeable and helpfull.  My wife and I are glad we did and our marriage has been blessed so much by what we learned.  Again Congratulations.

Answer 12

Well I'm personally LDS so I don't think they are right. What is the point on having the marriage "blessed" afterwards? When I got married the person officiating offerend their own blessing (more like a prayer).

It doesn't sound like you are catholic. So I wouldn't act like you are. This is your choice don't let your friends bully you into doing something that you don't want to.

Hope this helps. Good Luck!