Having children far apart in age

Question

my son is 7 and I'm thinking of trying for another child in the next year or 2 so that would make my son around 10 when I had the new baby. Does anyone else have kids this far apart? What are your experiences with it?

Answer 1

My kids are 12 years apart - not on purpose, they were both surprises, lol.

My experience with it has been that I am REALLY glad they were that far apart in age, because in some ways it's been like only having one child at a time and therefore easier. I've had quite a lot of experience keeping more than one small child at a time (big family!), and for me, it's not something I feel I could handle all the time.  

Answer 2

My daughter turned 8-- 9 days before my second daughter was born. They are far apart, but their are advantages and disadvantages. They will not be in the same school together or go to school together. They do get along very good and my older daughter helps out and like to play with her sister, but when my oldeer one has her friends over the younger one won't leave them alone and follows them all over like she is one of the girls. The older one doesn't seem to mind though. I don't think their is anything wrong with having them far apart. It is helpful. I do wish that they would be in the same school at the same time though. It will be fine to have another one and less stressful than if you had them 2 years apart. Go for it !  

Answer 3

I'm about to!

My first son was born Oct. 9, 1993 when I was twenty. My second son is due Nov. 9 of this year, when I'm 35. My boys are going to be 15 years and 1 month apart.

All I can tell you right now is that the older you get, the much harder pregnancy is on the body. This is killing me. Everything hurts: back, b*****s, knees, ribcage. I'm still sleeping ten hours a day. I'm glad I've only got another three months to go.

Of course I know it will all be worth it, but I'm pretty sure I'm done after this one. My body just can't take it.

Answer 4

HI!  I have three awesome boys, one who is 19, then a 17 year old then my baby who just turned 8 on Monday! Everything has worked out wonderful.  I will tell you that my little one is from my second marriage. They all get along well and love each other very much.  Since there is such an age difference it can feel like my little one is the "only child" I wish you the best  

Answer 5

i dont have kids yet, but my younger two brothers and i are 11 and 13 years apart. It's not too bad, i honestly thought it was pretty cool because i got to help out with baby more than i had with my previous siblings and now six years latter i am very protective of my brothers and make a large effort to be there for the little things like baseball games and stuff and they have one more adult role model to look up too

Answer 6

Yes I have two daughters 19 and 9.  guess what they were also born on the same exact day.  So they are 10 years apart.  The key is to build a strong family bond.  The older child won't really be interested in the younger child so you have to really stress that they need to be an active part of their siblings life.  Yet the younger child yearns to be a part of the older one.  Boys could be different, though.  My youngest wants to hang with my older child but my older child many times doesn't want to be bothered.  Now it's getting better though.  The teen years are the hardest because emotionally they are just all over the place and hates everybody.   The younger child wants to feel apart of the family and it's easy for them to feel left out when everybody in the house is older.  So again, you just have to make sure everybody's needs are fulfilled.  

I will say this.  The older child sure makes for a great in-home babysitter.

Answer 7

My little brother is 7 years younger than me, and we're pretty close. It made it pretty easy for my mom-we hardly ever fought, and I was always wanting to help with the baby:)

Answer 8

My cousin is twelve years older than her youngest sister, eleven years older than her oldest sister, and six years older than her brother. She seems to have done pretty well, and she's a great big sister.

The thing to be careful about in a situation like this is expecting your oldest to take care of the baby all of the time. It's one thing to ask him to watch his sibling occasionally (once he's a little older of course, and the baby isn't a baby anymore) while you go out, but you need to give him plenty of advance warning, and you shouldn't expect it.

Ask him as a favor, and remember that he didn't choose to have a kid. It isn't his responsibility. That is the big thing with older kids. My cousin was basically expected to raise her siblings, and that wasn't fair to her.

Other than that, I don't see a huge issue with it. Good luck, and I hope you enjoy your time with your kids.

Answer 9

I have 5 brothers and we're pretty spread apart.  I was 16 when my youngest brother was born.  We all get along great!!!  Everyone is at a different stage in life, which can sometimes be hectic, but it mostly brings us closer together because we're not competing for the same things.  Also, we can go to one another if a parent isn't available right away.  

Answer 10

My middle and youngest are 7 years apart and I found that to be really odd. All the 'rules' had changed by the time I had my youngest and i felt like a new mum again! Al though it did mean that, unlike with my eldest and middle who are only 3 and a half years apart, I could focus attention on the baby a lot more and was able to rest while the older 2 were in school. My step mum has 2 sons-one is my 20 year old step bother and the other is my 4 year old half brother so she has 16 years between her 2! She said she found the pregnancy to be a lot worse (she had a really rough time of it due to various things) but the labour was crazy and short (2 hours!!!). Mind you, he is a spoilt brat on occasion because he has so many people fawning over him lol!

Good luck!!!

Answer 11

i have a teacher that he son is 12 and her daughter is 1 so i mean that is quite an age difference. but she said that he son loves her daughter and the other way around.