Having problems with my race. HELP!?

Question

my mom had me when she was sorta young.

she had me with her boyfriend at the time.

she was black, he was white.

when i was born, i came out looking white.

i have a farely light complexion.

by the time i turned 1, they werent together anymore.

when i was three, my mom had met this very nice black man.

and married him.

he adopted me a short while after they were married.

i feel completely different and not right when im with my family.

they ended up having to kids.

so i have a younger sister and brother.

i feel so weird when we all go places as a family.

like out to eat or seomthing.

i feel like everyones staring and wondering my im white, and there all black.

its completely awkward.

and really hard, like the first time a friend comes over to my house.

i feel like i have to explain to them the hole story, so they dont think im weird.

i need help!

i thank you all who have any help in advance:)

Answer 1

You are not alone in feeling inadequate when suffering from identity crisis. That is what I call it. But you know, you seem to have more of an issue with self esteem. I have a mexican grandson and I am white. One day someone close to me asked me if it didn't embarress me that everyone looks at me weird with this child. My reply is No, why should it be? It never dawned on me to feel different because this child is not of my race. I only thought of this child as my blood! And let me tell you right now, no one messes with my "blood". You need to re evaluate your self esteem issues because family is the most important thing that you will ever be part of in this world. Those are your brother and sister, your blood mother and a stepfather who cared enough to adopt you. You are very lucky. Trust me, it's only going to get worse for you with peoples behaviors. Wait till you marry a black girl and you look like a white daddy with a black baby. OR marry a white girl and you you still have a black baby. When the time comes for you to marry and have children remember how you feel now, and you will know how to make your child be able to cope better in our world of different races, color. Work on your self esteem and love your family and you will grow into a confident man. Hold your head up and high...theres a lot of kids out there that would be pleased to take your place at the table with....."Family"

Answer 2

you shouldn't worry what your race is. as long as your family loves you and you love your family, that is all that matters. people stare because they are buttheads.

Answer 3

this is one of the few worthwhile questions ever asked on Yahoo Answers. seriously!

my ex girlfriend was black and im white. it was a pretty serious relationship and it was something i worried about all the time. my kids all being black and me the lone white guy. yours is a little more complicated but no worries, everything works out in the end. EVERYTHING!

Answer 4

I have the same problem

<---not me in my pic lol

i'm like you

I was white when I was a baby

and my mom is black and my dad is white too

and my dad left me and now im stuck with a black family

the best thing to do is ignore and be human, it's hard because they will stare and give me and my blck mom funny looks!

and ask if I'm her daughter and people are just annoying, so the best thing to do is just ignore.

Answer 5

i kno wat u mean. i mixed race too and it can be very difficult explaining to people why you don't look like the average black person or the average white person. I look at myself as one of a kind and thats all that matters

Answer 6

You don't have to explain!  and in today's world it doesn't matter.  There could have been white in one of your black parents genes and it just came out with you!  Don't worry about it and live your life the way you want to. Good Luck

Answer 7

there will all ways be a holes in the world, don't let them get to you, you know who you are and be proud of it.

Answer 8

If you are not ashamed of yourself or your family, you should not feel the need to explain anything. If a friend asks, then you can  tell them. Otherwise, be happy with who you are. There are many "blended" families all over the country, there is nothing unusual or odd about it.

Answer 9

I am sorry you are having to go through all of the feelings of insecurity.  Everyone does, trust me.  

I certainly hope that your relationship with your family is supportive.  with that being said, everybody goes through some type of identity crisis.

don't feel like you are the odd man out.  You are an individual with a lot to offer.  You must maintain strong and positive and don't be embarrassed.  

Everyone is different -- yours is just more on the surface.  I suggest you talk to a counselor or a good friend and have that person let you speak.

Do you still have contact with your dad?  well, for his sake I hope he does because he would be missing out.  Can you talk to him about it?

Regardless, you are a unique individual with a gift and you will one day find it.

Take good care and keep strong.

Answer 10

My daughter is also light complex-ed and people ask question like that to me all the time,the only think I say is she's my child and I love her very much, It never matters what people think that's life if your parents loves you and support you then right there you have alot to be thankful for people should be able to see who you are as a person and you don't have to explain that.