He's 6 feet below the ground. Am I also?

Question

My boyfriend died almost one month ago from lymphoma (cancer of the lymph nodes). During the first two weeks I cry too much, until it came to the point when I actually moved on. But after a few days, the memories unfold and held me back. I'm getting even more in love with him, and appreciate the things he has done for me. Every time I look at the sky, I see his face. I miss him so much it makes me weak. The only way I could be with him now is to sit on the grass in front of his grave. I just want to see him. I know I can move on if I want to, but I don't. I don't want to leave him behind. The last time we talked was when he broke up with me because he wanted to rest, and told me to wait for him. He was suffering much from the disease that time. It was about 2 weeks before his death. Anybody help me please

Answer 1

  I think your feeling are fairly normal for anyone following such a tragic expirerience. I prophesy that you will always love him to some degree but when time passes the 'hurt' will dimenish and someone new will come into your life. That is not to say you will forget this romance ever but I promise it will dim until it's bearable.I offer you my condolences.

Answer 2

Keep crying until the tears are gone. Don't stop

you need to cry.

If you don't its not normal.

you hurt.

your sad.

when you are ready to let go you will. and that person does not want you to keep hanging on. They need to move their soul along to help them get to heaven when your done crying tell them they must go.

Answer 3

I am sorry to hear of your suffering and loss.  Even though I don't know you my heart goes out to you.  Try to remember the good times as much as you can.  I bet he would want you to be happy.  His spirit/energy does live on to inspire you, you see him in the sky.  You will always have him in your heart, you will always remember him.  Through your suffering, at the other end,  you will find happiness and peace.   Feel free to email me if you want, any time.   Peace to you.  

Answer 4

You have to think about all the good times you had together, but do not let them dwell on you.

Try to find another general realm of focus; this will take your mind off of him for the most part. If you do find yourself thinking of him again, then always think of the good times. Let them roll...

Answer 5

You can love him forever, but don't feel sorry for yourself because he is gone.  He is in heavan and you are doing OK here on earth.  One of these days you will find someone else to love and it could happen anytime.  That won't change your neverending love for the one who has passed on.

Answer 6

To start with please accept my condolence.  You a are a very special person who is fortunate enough to be experiencing true love.  I always believe that when people we love pass away, the experience of the life we share with them never stop.  The life will carry on but in a way, you could never leave him behind now.  He could be sitting beside you even now whispering in your ear sweet words of encourage, willing you to have courage and live life on his behalf as well as yours.  You said, he suffered so much in life with pain, please think of the relief he has now.  You must never kill the love you have in your heart, use the energy to do something that will keep his memeory alive for hever, you could fundrais money for canser research or set up a trust fund in his name.  Writting this note to you, I feel that I have become a party in sharing your pain.  I  like many other who knew him and his life with you, would like to say be strong and help us to remember him through you.  Your late boy friend has given his life to you to carry it for him, if you listen carefully, you will hear two hearts beating in your chest.  Take courage from all of us. God Bless you.

Answer 7

This may not be helpful. I have heard it takes just over one year to fully accept a death of someone close to you, because you have to go through every event and aniversary without him once to fully accept they are gone. Moving on to new things can take a little longer. So these feelings might persist for a long time, but not forever. And people have their own individual ways of dealing with that, it will take you a while to find these as well.