He loves me and he wants to marry me?

Question

ok my boyfriend wants to marry me. i love him like he's my husband and he loves like i'm his wife. he's charming,smart, and very kind to me. we kind of have a long distance relationship because he's in his home country which is syria.he also want me to move to Syria with him. everything seems like it's wonderful but the only thing i'm worried about is that i'm a christian and he's a muslim. i'm worried that our different beliefs will effect our relationship. he said i can keep my religion and i don't have to convert to islam. can someone tell me what to do with this situation?

Answer 1

Paris, sorry but you do not appear sold on the idea of marrying this fella.  Why bother asking others (strangers) to make the decision for you, when it appears you have already made up your mind.  Be honest with this fella and let him know of your fears and that you are not committed to marriage to him yet.  Best of luck.

Answer 2

You better check the laws before you go, unless you want to end up in some desert with 12 guys throwing rocks at you.

Answer 3

If you don't know the answers to this yet, you're stepping off into deeper water than you could EVER imagine. Go there for a visit. See what you'll be dealing with. Maybe it's for you. But you're not going to be Queen Noor of Jordan, with the power and freedom that goes with being a powerful royal. You're going to be a Syrian wife from a reviled country, the U.S. And it will NOT be like just living in a Syrian neighborhood of a U.S. city. Your religion will NOT be respected. You will be moving into a culture with a lot of features that many Americans would find detestable, and you will not have anything like the ability to comment on it or try to change it that you have now.  

Answer 4

You can marry him but you need to visit his country before making a final decision. You might not like it and you have to see how life is over there. You also have to discuss if you can have other options like going back to the US (I am assuming you are american)

For the religion, in islam a man can marry a Christian women but his kids will be muslim, so it will be important for you to accept this idea.

Finally you have to know how his family feel about this situation, family is very important in the middle east and you want to make sure he is not going against his family on this, they will make your life miserable if they don't like you.

Answer 5

Follow your heart. No one knows what the future holds, but it's worth a shot to give it all you have to make this relationship work, Either you two are meant to be or not, the choice is yours.Good luck:)

Answer 6

Sidebar  from  Encarta   Appears in



Customs of Syria

“Custom, then, is the great guide of human life,” wrote Scottish philosopher David Hume. Knowing the customs of a country is, in effect, a guide to understanding the soul of that country and its people. The following Sidebar is intended to provide a glimpse into the unique world of this nation’s customs: how people marry, how families celebrate holidays and other occasions, what people eat, and how they socialize and have fun.



Customs of Syria

Marriage and Family



Beehive Houses of Syria

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Most people are careful to choose a potential marriage partner of whom the family approves. In fundamentalist circles, courtship practices follow rigid traditional rules, and parents play a dominant role in selecting marital partners for their children.



Most people live with or near the extended family. Syrians place a high priority on mutual support and acting in the best interests of the family and its reputation; the majority of social activities are arranged on a family basis. The father is usually considered the undisputed head of the family. The elderly are shown particular respect.

Eating

Syrian cuisine is similar in style to that of other Muslim countries in Southwest Asia. Muslims do not eat pork or drink alcoholic beverages. Mezza (a table full of appetizers) is often served at restaurants and clubs. It includes pastes made of chickpeas and eggplant, dishes of meats (raw or grilled) mixed with spices and wheat, pickles, olives, and breads. Syrians also enjoy sweets.

It is considered good manners to decline an offer of food or drink twice before accepting, but it is impolite to refuse the offer completely. Food should be eaten with the right hand, although on formal occasions Western utensils may be used. During the month of Ramadan, Muslims fast from sunrise to sunset, eating and drinking only after sundown. In public, non-Muslims are expected to conform with Muslim practices.

You sure you want to go????

Answer 7

If this difference in religion hasn't come between you two yet, and you don't mind the move to Syria, then marry the guy.  

Answer 8

Please don't go.  I've seen too many women fall into this trap.  Once you marry one of their men, you become their property.  Many Christian women follow Muslim beliefs because of their husbands.  Not because they want to, but because they are forced to.  Your children will grow up Muslim as well.  Definitely research the culture and the religion, and think about if you would want your daughters to grow up that way.

Answer 9

Just a few words to the wise: One, Syria is an avowed enemy of the USA; two, if you have children and later have a falling out, you will never be able to take your children out of Syria and you could be in danger yourself. The culture is very very different from ours; it is extreme and strict and unforgiving. There are no "do-overs" no extenuating circumstances and no allowances and above all, virtually no protection from the USA once you liven over there. I know everything is moonlight and roses right now, but things change over time and if your relationship goes south you will be placing yourself and possibly your children in very grave danger with no way out.

You will be giving up all of your freedoms and you will be prey to the hostility of Syrians who will revile you, you will be an outcast in that country and be very lonely.

This guy is telling you everything he thinks you want to hear in order to get you there, but once you go, you're doomed. You need to re think this very carefully and then...don't go.

Answer 10

He is lying to you. I highly recommend that you get some books about women and Syria and start reading. You will find that women are NOT equal to men in the least in Syria. You WILL likely be forced to change religions. Islamic men are allowed to marry non-Islamic women- for the sole purpose of converting what they consider to be the "weaker" s*x. Islamic women are NOT allowed to marry non-Islamic men, however. You will also be forced to dress differently. You will be completely at the whim of your husband. And your non-Eastern background will subject you to mistreatment, racism, and personal bias against you. Frankly, if that is ok by you, fine, but I think you will be making a HUGE mistake. Discuss this with people who are close to you and find out what they think. Most of them, I suspect, will agree with me. Regardless, educate yourself on the subject before you make a decision. It is the smart thing to do.

Good luck!

Answer 11

It won't work out. Look for a good Christian man closer to home.

Answer 12

As a Christian, I can understand where you are coming from. I would spend a great deal of time in prayer about this. If you seek God's will for your life, you can't ever go wrong...Good luck to you, whatever happens...

Answer 13

Are you planning on having children? If both of you are ok with each other's religious beliefs, then the next thing you need to discuss is how the kids will be raised. You may both want to raise them in your respective faiths, and it may become a source of conflict.

P.S. Sorry, I missed the "he wants me to move to Syria" bit. In this regard, I do agree with the previous posters who recommend you do some research on the customs and laws of this country before making your decision. It is a foreign culture, and regardless of how your husband may feel about your religious beliefs, the rest of the folks around you might not be as kind. I don't know much about Syria, but from what I have heard it doesn't sound like it's a very free country (in fact, it sounds quite the opposite). Do your homework and go there for a visit before you decide whether to move there or not. I personally wouldn't be moving to a country with a culture so different from my own.

Answer 14

Babygirl check it out, love is one thing, however, to move to a Communist region of the world that doesn't promote equal rights for both genders is a step no one should take in the name of love. Almost certainly you'd be out-casted not only as a female but as a foreigner too. If he REALLY loved you, he would moved to the states to you.

Answer 15

read a book called ' not without my daughter'.  ''

and read mr tacos answer again.  

then read it again.  

Answer 16

Don't marry him and go to Syria. You do that, and you will regret doing it.

Answer 17

Very bad Idea!

Answer 18

HE JUST WANTS US CITIZENSHIP all these foreigners say the same thing to all women in America. Now you want to change your religion for this jerk. h**l no leaving jesus for Muslim is like kicking god in the face. My ex friends mom married a muslim and she turned to islam and she threw away god. No way